PREFACE

When I began working as a therapist, my clients were primarily adults. We spent hour after hour talking about their childhoods, and I saw how important it was for a child to have a good connection with a parent or another adult. Naturally, when I had my own child, I was determined to establish and maintain a strong emotional bond with her. I quickly came to appreciate how challenging this can be. Attachment between parents and babies is virtually instinctual, but it gets complicated as soon as the child becomes more active and verbal.

Regardless of whether I was having a good day or a bad day, was in the mood or not, my daughter, Emma, wanted to play. She wanted to interact with me when I didn't feel like interacting with anybody; she wanted my complete attention when I had other things to attend to; she wanted me to be on call, even if she was playing alone. I was surprised at the intensity of mixed emotions this aroused in me. More often than I'd like to admit, I'd find myself wanting to do anything else rather than get down on the floor and engage Emma's seemingly bottomless need for attention and play. Or I'd get on the floor and promptly fall asleep—and not just from being a tired parent. After all, I had already given so much of myself, and now she wanted me to play .

As time went on, my practice began to shift toward play therapy with children and support for their parents. While adult therapy tends to cast parents as the villains, I started to see what a powerful positive force they can be in their children's lives. And the single most important skill parents could acquire, it seemed to me, was playing. Fortunately, unlike many personality changes we might like to make, better playing skills can be learned pretty easily.

We all know we are supposed to turn off the TV and spend more time together. But then what? Playful Parenting is a guide to having more fun with young people of all ages as they tackle new accomplishments, recover from being hurt, or are simply bursting with youthful exuberance. Through the practice of Playful Parenting—joining children in their world, focusing on connection and confidence, giggling and roughhousing, reversing the roles and following your child's lead—you will learn how to help them work through their emotional blocks and how to handle their strong emotions (and your own). You will also learn how to deal effectively with sibling rivalry and other tricky problems, and how to rethink your ideas about discipline and punishment.

Finally, in order to be fountains of hopefulness and enthusiasm for children, we must find ways to replenish ourselves. Playful Parenting offers practical help in becoming the best parents, and the most playful parents, we can be. Parents can learn to balance the serious business of heartfelt connections with the silliness of wild play. Playful Parenting can help solve a variety of family difficulties, but it is also for families where everything is going fine. It helps every child have more fun, and it's great for grown-ups. After all, we need to play, too.