The mind gives us thousands of ways to say no, but there’s only one way to say yes, and that’s from the heart.
—SUZE ORMAN
Once you decide to accept an invitation or grant a request, simply say so; this is one of the easiest letters to write.
A yes that doesn’t come from the heart results in an unenthusiastic acceptance and you may even find yourself backing out later. Writing the acceptance is not as difficult as being sure you want to say yes in the first place.
• admissions requests: schools/clubs/organizations
• franchise applications
• invitations: dinner/meeting/party/luncheon/hospitality
• job offers
• membership offers: board/commission/organization
• proposals
• requests: contributions/favors/help
• speaking invitations: conference/workshop/banquet
• wedding invitations (see WEDDINGS)
• Express your pleasure in accepting the invitation/offer/proposal/bid or agreeing to do what was asked.
• Repeat the details of what you are accepting (meeting date and time, amount of the bid or of your contribution, the precise nature of your assistance, the duties you agree to assume).
• Inquire about particular needs: receipt for a tax-deductible contribution, directions to your host’s home, wheelchair accessibility, equipment for your speech, list of other organizers.
• Close with an expression of pleasure to come (seeing the person, working for the company, being part of the group) or of future action (what you want to accomplish, actions you intend to take, a reciprocal invitation).
• Avoid ungracious amplifications: you are busy but you suppose you can manage it; you have two other events on the calendar that evening but you will try to stop by; you probably won’t be a good speaker but, sure, you’ll try. Let your yes be a simple yes. If you have reservations about your acceptance, it may be better to decline.
• Send acceptances as soon as possible. If you are late, apologize, but do not dwell on it.
• Acceptances are brief and generally deal only with the acceptance.
• Noted usage expert Rudolf Flesch says, “If your answer to an inquiry is yes, it’s a good idea to make yes the first word of your letter.”
• Be enthusiastic. It is entirely proper to simply state your acceptance and repeat the details of the invitation, but your stock with hosts, employers, or friends will go up if you add a sentence saying something personal, cheerful, or lively.
• When your invitation is issued in the name of more than one person, mention all of them in your reply. Mail your reply either to the person listed under the RSVP or to the first name given.
• Always respond promptly to an invitation marked “RSVP” or “Please reply.” This is mandatory, obligatory, required, compulsory, imperative, and essential.
• When offered a position you want, write an acceptance letter that expresses your enthusiasm and pleasure and that confirms the details of your employment.
• When writing to offer a job to an applicant, include: a congratulatory remark about being chosen and something complimentary about the person’s credentials, experience, or interview; information about the job—duties, salary, supervisor’s name, starting date; the name and telephone number of someone who can answer questions; an expression of goodwill about the person’s employment with the company. Highlight some of the advantages of working for the company to influence the person’s decision to accept the offer.
• In some situations (large weddings, for example), one of a couple may accept an invitation while the other declines. In other cases (large dinner parties), check with your host to see if this is acceptable.
• White House invitations include the phone number of the Social Office where you telephone your acceptance and can ask questions about protocol, where to park your car, what to wear, how to respond to the invitation. General guidelines are: send your reply within a day of receiving the invitation; write the reply yourself (do not have a secretary do it); handwrite your reply on plain or engraved personal stationery; use the same format and person (first person or third person) to reply but insert “have the honor of accepting”; if the invitation was sent by the President’s or First Lady’s secretary (in the case of an informal invitation), reply to that person and write “Would you please tell/convey to...”
• Children can write brief acceptances for invitations: “Thank you for inviting me to your Halloween party. Wait till you see my costume!”
• Model your reply on the format used in the invitation or letter. If it is handwritten, handwrite your reply. If letterhead stationery is used, reply on your letterhead. If the invitation is e-mailed, e-mail your acceptance. When the language of the invitation is informal, your reply is also informal. When replying to a formal invitation, use nearly the same words, layout, and style as the invitation:
Mr. and Mrs. Masterson Finsbury
request the pleasure of
Mr. and Mrs. Edward Bloomfield’s company
at a dinner-dance
on Saturday, the seventh of February
at eight o’clock
Gideon Country Club
Mr. and Mrs. Edward Bloomfield
accept with pleasure
the kind invitation of
Mr. and Mrs. Masterson Finsbury
to a dinner-dance
on Saturday, the seventh of February
at eight o’clock
Gideon Country Club
WORDS
PHRASES
SENTENCES
After reviewing your application, we are pleased to be able to offer you the funding requested.
I accept with pleasure the position of senior research chemist.
I am happy to be able to do this.
I appreciate very much (and accept) your generous apology.
I’ll be happy to meet with you in your office March 11 at 10:30 to plan this year’s All-City Science Fair.
In a word, absolutely!
In response to your letter asking for support for the Foscari Children’s Home, I’m enclosing a check for $500.
Thank you for inviting me to speak at the Chang-Ch’un Meditation Center next month.
We accept your kind invitation with great pleasure.
We are happy to accept your estimate for refinishing our Queen Anne dining room suite.
We are pleased to grant you the six-week extension you requested to complete your work.
We are pleased to tell you that your application for admission to the Emmet School has been approved.
We look forward to working with you.
PARAGRAPHS
I will be delighted to have dinner with you on Friday, the sixteenth of March, at seven o’clock. Thanks so much for asking me. I can hardly wait to see you and Anders again.
Thanks for telling me how much the children at St. Joseph’s Home liked my storytelling the other night. I’m happy to accept your invitation to become a regular volunteer and tell stories every other Thursday evening. Do you have a CD player so that I could use music with some of the stories?
I’m looking forward to your graduation and the reception afterward. Thanks for including me.
Your bid of $6,780 to wallpaper our reception rooms has been accepted. Please read the enclosed contract and call with any questions. We were impressed with the attention to detail in your proposal and bid, and we are looking forward to our new walls.
SAMPLE LETTERS
Dear Selina,
Vickers and I accept with pleasure your kind invitation to a celebration of your parents’ fiftieth wedding anniversary on Saturday, July 16, at 7:30 p.m.
Sincerely,
——
Dear Dr. Cheesewright:
Thank you for inviting me to speak at your county dental society’s dinner banquet on October 26 at 7:00. I am happy to accept and will, as you suggested, discuss new patient education strategies.
I’m not sure how much time you have allotted me—will you let me know?
With best wishes,
——
Dear Ms. Thirkell,
I am pleased to accept your offer of the position of assistant director of the Gilbert Tebben Working Family Center.
I enjoyed the discussions with you, and I look forward to being part of this dynamic and important community resource.
The salary, hours, responsibilities, and starting date that we discussed during our last meeting are all agreeable to me. I understand that I will receive the standard benefits package, with the addition of two weeks’ vacation during my first year.
Sincerely yours,
Laurence Dean
——
Dear Dr. Bennett,
I would be most happy to perform twenty minutes of magic tricks at the Five Towns Children’s Hospital annual fair to be held on Saturday, November 8. As the date approaches, we can discuss details.
All the best,
Anna Tellwright
——
Dear Mr. Grandby:
We are pleased to accept for publication your self-help book, tentatively entitled Don’t Give Up . All of us are excited about its possibilities.
Enclosed are guidelines from the production editor to help you prepare the final manuscript. Also enclosed is a preliminary draft of the book contract. Please look it over, and I will call next week to discuss it.
Sincerely yours,
——
Dear Ms. Unwin:
Congratulations! Your franchise application has been approved. Welcome to the Sunshine family.
Enclosed is the contract, which we suggest you discuss with your attorney, and a packet of informational materials.
Please call this office to set up an appointment to discuss any questions.
Sincerely,
——
Dear Violet,
Yes! I will be delighted to stay with the twins while you and Gordon take the horses to the state fair. A week is not too long for me. And thanks for the offer of the plane ticket—I accept with pleasure.
Love,
——
Dear Mr. Van Druten,
In response to your letter of February 10, we are pleased to grant you a two-month extension of the loan of the slides showing scenes of our amusement park. We appreciate being able to help you add, as you said, “a bit of amusement” to your corporate meetings.
We offer this extension with our compliments.
Cordially,
Laura Simmons
——
Dear Richard,
I will be happy to write you a letter of reference, and I’m delighted that you thought to ask me. You were one of my favorite students, and I’ll enjoy explaining just why to Forey, Harley and Wentworth.
Yours truly,
——
Mr. Clarence Rochester
accepts with pleasure
William Portlaw and Alida Ascott’s
kind invitation to dinner
on the sixteenth of June at 7:30 p.m.
but regrets that
Dr. Maggie Campion
will be absent at that time.
——
See also: REFUSALS, RESPONSES