中译出版社要出版英国人S.M.布莱克(Shirley M.Black)翻译的《浮生六记》译本, Chapters from A Floating Life ,嘱我写序。这个译本我很喜欢,也很爱读。就此机会,我谈谈对这个译本的感觉和认识。
(清)乾隆、嘉庆年间苏州人沈复,他写了一本《浮生六记》,记叙他与妻子陈芸短暂一生的故事。这个真实故事让我们了解二百多年前一个普通的小知识分子的家庭生活,以及当时的社会风情。书中特别细致地记录了沈复与妻子婚后和谐的夫妻生活、文化情趣,以及后来因其家庭变故和疾病所造成的困顿,母子诀别,夫妻颠沛流离,直至陈芸因无钱就医,病入膏肓而客死他乡。二十几年的短暂婚姻,让他们享受了夫妻生活的快乐与幸福,也经历了旧时封建礼俗的磨难。半生潦倒,余生坎坷,悲哉,悲哉,读之凄然,为之惋惜。
沈复不是当今意义上的作家,但他却有很高的文学修养和语言天赋,他以朴素而富有文采的文字所记载的感人故事成就了中国文学史上一部优秀作品,感动了万千读者,流传至今,也必将传之后世。
一部文学作品,能够流传,取决于两个因素:一要故事感人,二要文字讲究,二者缺一不可。《浮生六记》正是因为在这两个方面的成功,不仅吸引了众多读者,也吸引了不同时期的翻译家。他们立志并倾注了很高的热情将这本书翻译成英语。目前见到的有三个译本:
1. Six Chapters of A Floating Life ,林语堂译,1935年以双语形式刊登于上海英文杂志《天下月刊》和《西风月刊》;
2. Chapters from A Floating Life ,S.M.布莱克译,1960年在伦敦出版;
3. Six Records of a Floating Life ,白伦(Leonard Pratt)、江素惠(Chiang Su-hui)合译,以双语形式,于2006年由译林出版社出版。
《浮生六记》原文分六卷,几位译者都只翻译了前四卷,因为后两卷,即第五卷《中山记历》和第六卷《养生记逍》,据考证,不是沈复原作,所以,这两卷都未翻译。
三个译文里,林译本和白、江译本都是双语本,后者译本的原文附有汉语今译,书后并有三个“附录”及二百多条“注释”;两个译本依照原文的情节翻译,未做增删,未做改动。
S.M.布莱克译本是另一种情况,她删除了原文中相当一部分文字,并在译文中对原文做了重新编排,理由是:
I have omitted many episodes from the fourth part, concerned with visits to temples and scenic places, which are rather alike and would not mean much to the reader unacquainted with the actual places described.Some sections of literary criticism, gardening and botany I have also left out, as I felt they were of too specialized a nature to be of general interest.Other episodes I have rearranged into a less confusing chronological order.
此外,这个译文还插入了原文所没有的清代画家的十来幅画作,她认为:
The illustrations used in the book are reproductions of paintings by some of the best of the individualist painters of the Ch’ing dynasty—paintings which Shen Fu, Yün and their friends might have chosen, and in styles in which they might well have painted.
译文中有几个地方,为了解释原文中的典故,增添了一些文字。
经过译者的一番整理,译文比原文在篇幅上有压缩,面目有区别。具体变动情况可见附在文后的[附录]。
关于译者对原文的增与删,以及所做的重新编排,译者说得很清楚,故这里对其是与非、利与弊等,暂不做讨论。我们集中讨论她所翻译的部分,主要围绕译者所写的《前言》中谈及她所设定的几个翻译原则进行讨论,对我们研究她的译文有启发。
一般情况下,译者在动笔翻译之前都有一个大略的或清晰的指导思想和翻译策略,因而译出来的文字也各有自己的特色。布莱克给自己提了三个原则,她说:
In translating the memoirs I have tried first of all to recreate the subtle emotional atmosphere, at once tragic, passionate and gay, which is, in my opinion, the outstanding characteristic of Shen Fu’s original.I have also tried to be as meticulous as I could in expressing the exact meaning of the Chinese words, at the same time trying to approximate the feeling of the author’s own way of expressing himself.
她的这个声明,一方面表示了她的信心;一方面表明了她对汉、英翻译之难的认识,正如她自己所说,“This is a rather difficult job with languages as different from one another as Chinese and English and I do not know that I have even partially succeeded”;同时,这个声明也表明了她的高度责任感。
后来翻译《红楼梦》的霍克斯(David Hawkes)在他为译文写的《序言》里,也有类似的表示,他说:
“My one abiding principle has been to translate everything—even puns...I cannot pretend always to have done so successfully, but if I can convey to the reader even a fraction of the pleasure this Chinese novel has given me, I shall not have lived in vain.”
“把所有的东西都译出来——甚至双关语”。他把译好《红楼梦》作为自己的终身事业,为能译好这本书而感觉光荣,感觉不虚此生。这是多么好的声明,多么大的雄心壮志,多么高的责任感。
在汉、英翻译历史上,有布莱克和霍克斯这样的翻译家,是很难得的现象,也是很令人鼓舞的榜样,值得译家们学习。
布莱克的这段声明概括起来,第一,“to recreate the subtle emotional atmosphere”;第二,“to be as meticulous as I could in expressing the exact meaning of the Chinese words”;第三,“to approximate the feeling of the author’s own way of expressing himself”。
她的这个声明对我们阅读和理解她的译文很重要。为了讨论方便,不妨将这三点分开来谈,但它们又不是孤立的,在译文中往往交织在一起。
由于译者遵循着这几条声明,我们在她的译文里经常发现,她不是严格地依据原文做词与句的对译,而是对语义浓缩的文言文用英语进行解释,将其丰富的内涵挖掘出来,展示其语言的审美特征;有时也对原文里的文化或典故进行阐释,而且译文行文自然、流畅,少有翻译腔。这是因为译者考虑了译文读者的接受心理和审美需求,而努力译出这样的文字,实属难得。而且,这种译法并不违背原文意旨。因此,我们说,她的译文带有“释义”的性质,也带有“创作”的痕迹。
一、所谓“emotional atmosphere”,指“思想情绪”,或“情绪氛围”,常常与环境相关。在原文,成功描写这种情绪者并不鲜见,在译文,特别是在文言文的英译文里,成功孕育这种情绪,并运用具有美感的文字将其表达出来,使其具有感染力,十分可贵。
我们看陈芸在新婚之夜忘情读书的情景:
[原文]……悄然入室,伴妪盹于床下,芸卸妆尚未卧,高烧银烛,低垂粉颈,不知观何书而出神若此……
[译文] Quietly I entered my bridal chamber, where the bride’s attendant lay dozing on the floor.Yuen, who had taken off her wedding finery, was not yet in bed. She was sitting, in the light from a pair of tall silver candles, with her delicate white neck bent over a book, so completely absorbed in her reading that she was unaware that I had come into the room. (p.29)
这段译文与原文有异曲同工之妙,尤其是将“高烧银烛”译作“in the light from a pair of tall silver candles”;将“低垂粉颈”译作“with her delicate white neck bent over a book”,将二者作为“She was sitting...”的状语,刻画了芸在烛光之下读书的优雅姿态。当沈复问道,“姊连日辛苦,何犹孜孜不倦耶?”芸答曰,“顷正欲卧,开橱得此书,不觉阅之忘倦。”她得到的这本书正是《西厢记》,这本书让她忘记了新婚之欢,而沉浸在另外一个世界里,这何尝不是一种“情绪氛围”,或“精神境界”。译文语言之优美,形象之鲜明,堪比原文,属经典译句。
译文中的“...with...bent over a book”,值得特别留意,描绘的是一种状态,一个美人读书的优美状态;若将其写成“...was bending her neck...”,则是一个进行中的动作,那就无美可言了。
顺便提一个与“bending”有关的插曲,2009年春天,英国威廉王子Prince William代表女王访问澳大利亚,在悉尼的一个社区活动中心,一个六岁小女孩问他一个问题。
When he landed in Sydney and visited a community centre, William handled with aplomb a six-year-old girl who asked if his mummy had died.‘Yes, she did,’he said bending down to her height. ‘It was pretty sad.’
小女孩问了一个可爱的问题,Diana早在她出生前好几年已经死了。这里的“bending down to her height”是一个动作,但“bending”用在这个语境里是一个鲜明的画面,高高的威廉王子向着六岁小女孩弯下腰来回答她的问题,多么慈祥、多么优雅的形象。
让我们回过来再谈布莱克的译文。
好的作家和译家都追求文字之美,特别是翻译中国古代文言文,写好英语句子,再现文字之美,对谁都是挑战。有人说,写句子是艺术,这个见解很好。不经其事,不知其难,写句子确实是艺术。英国作家毛姆(Maugham, W.Somerset)在他的文章“Lucidity”里说,“Words have weight, sound and appearance; it is only by considering these that you can write a sentence that is good to look at and good to listen to”。他要求写句子既要好听又要好看,这是他经过一生的写作对英语句子的感悟。
布莱克翻译的这个句子不仅听着好听、看着好看,而且成功塑造了一个旧时贤淑女子的形象,也创造了一个不属于新婚之夜的优美意境。
沈复与芸婚后不久,尊从父命,离别妻子赴杭州赵省斋先生门下读书。
[原文]“居三月,如十年之隔。”
[译文] The next three months, as I dragged my way through them, felt like ten years of unendurable separation.(p.39)
“如十年之隔”之类,汉语里表达离别之痛时常这样说,译文在“separation”之前加了形容词“unendurable”,而且,这个译句还补了“as I dragged my way through them”,虽然原文字面上没有这句,但译者在作者的平叙之中感觉到他身处异地、思乡思妻、度日如年的心情,译文也就将这一心情充分地表达出来了。
[原文]“每当风生竹院,月上蕉窗……”
[译文]Every time the wind rustled the bamboos in my courtyard or the moon silvered the leaves of the banana trees beside my window...(p.39)
“风生竹院,月上蕉窗”,不是诗句,但其声响节奏、其形式对仗,以及其意象意境,皆具诗之美感。这里对风竹、月蕉的环境描写,“情景交融”,衬托了作者当时的心绪。
首先是“竹院”和“蕉窗”如何译,需要考虑,从何处落笔,怎么用英语把这种情景写出来,又富有诗意。在这些方面译文也努力取得原文的效果,尤其在再现原文意象意境上是很成功的。其中“...the wind rustled”和“...the moon silvered”里的两个动词也用得好。前者让我们听见风中竹丛的窸窣作响;后者让我们看见蕉叶上的斑驳月光。
译文里有一点似可再作斟酌,即“月上蕉窗”中的宾语(作为动宾或介宾)应该是“窗”而不是“蕉”,此句似可换一个方式表达:
Every time the wind rustled the bamboos in my courtyard and(或用“or”) the moon cast its light on my window through the dancing leaves of the banana trees...
[原文]“对景怀人,梦魂颠倒。”
[译文]“I remembered other moons and other nights until my soul became entranced with an unreal world of dreams and fancies.”(p.39)
译者理解“怀人”的含义,作者想起了往日与妻子在皎洁的月光之下度过的美好夜晚,这样的理解和处理是合理的,也符合实际,译文成功阐释了“怀人”的含义。
对于“梦魂颠倒”,依照字面翻译比较困难。译者发挥她的想象力,译出了沈复此时的思绪万千,进入梦幻世界的情景。译文将沈复思念妻子的心情写得真实感人。
二、关于“to be as meticulous as I could in expressing the exact meaning of the Chinese words”,一丝不苟地将汉语字、词的确切含义表达出来。很多情况下,文言词语在英语里找不到词义相当的对应词(equivalent),即使在词典里找到意思相近的词,也很难表达它的隐含意思。译者为自己树立这样的目标,是对自己提出的一个很高的要求,翻译过程中她确实也在努力这样做。
乾隆乙未冬,即1775年冬天,芸堂姐出嫁,沈复随母前去送亲,见到芸时有这样一段描写:
[原文]……时但见满室鲜衣,芸独通体素淡,仅新其鞋而已。
[译文]The house was gay, on this ceremonious occasion,with the rainbow-hued new robes of the family and the wedding guests.Yuen alone, looked her quiet, simple self, having added nothing to her everyday dress but a pair of bright new shoes.(p.19)
译者运用想象,将“满室鲜衣”译作“The house was gay, on this ceremonious occasion, with the rainbowhued new robes of the family and the wedding guests”,送亲时,家人和客人身穿色彩鲜艳的新衣,译文用了两个语义一致的形容词,“gay”和“rainbow-hued”,亮丽、多彩;“芸独通体素淡”,译文“Yuen alone, looked her quiet, simple self”,这不只是指芸的穿着打扮,更指她历来以“素淡”为美的品质,意义似更深了一层。
[原文]见其绣制精巧,询为己作,始知其慧心不仅在笔墨也。
[译文] When I had admired the artistry of their embroidery and learned that she had made the shoes herself, I began to understand that Yuen was extremely capable and practical; that reading, writing, and composing poetry were only a few of her many accomplishments.(p.19)
译文将“慧心”译作“extremely capable and practical”,心灵手巧;将“不仅”用“only a few of...”表示,因为译文句式有了变化,是为了这个缘故。
“笔墨”,“指文字或诗文书画等”,这里的“笔墨”过去是怎么翻译的,我们不得而知。这里译者将其译作“reading, writing, and composing poetry”,用具体而确切的词语表达原文中一个笼统的概念,而且符合原文所指。译者如此细致地拆解文字完全是为了让译文读者明白,非常好的用心。
再如:
[原文]余性爽直,落拓不羁;芸若腐儒,迂拘多礼。
[译文] I am naturally straightforward and easy-going, unhampered by convention; but Yuen, like a pedantic old Confucian scholar, firmly believed in propriety and ceremony, and insisted on observing many oldfashioned formalities in our daily life.(p.51)
[原文]“余性爽直,落拓不羁”,
[译文]:“ I am naturally straightforward and easy going, unhampered by convention;...”,
这个译文把原文所包含的意思几乎都包括了。“爽直”,译作“straightforward”,表示人品性格时,意为“honest and frank”,“落拓”,为“豪迈,不拘束”,也即“落拓不羁”,译文用了“easy-going”和“unhampered by convention”。“easy-going”有“relaxed and tolerant in approach and manner”之意,也有潇洒的成分。虽然句子形式不同,但原文意思表达得准确无误。
三、关于“to approximate the feeling of the author’s own way of expressing himself”,即,尽量对作者特有的表达自己情感的方式有所感觉,这种感觉对准确再现原文所描写的情绪至关重要。
芸临死前对沈复有一番诀别之语,继而又说:
[原文]“愿君另续德容兼备者,以奉双亲,抚我遗子,妾亦瞑目矣。”
[译文]“I hope you will marry again—someone both kind and beautiful, who will serve your parents and take my place with my forsaken children.Then at last I can close my eyes.”(p.341)
沈复与芸曾一起游园,偶遇浙江歌妓温冷香之女憨园,芸喜其美貌与修养,便竭力为沈复物色为妾,后“憨为有力者夺去,不果,芸竟以之死”,芸因未能了却此愿,伤心欲绝。当此临死之际,仍不忘嘱咐沈复续弦,说了以上的话。
“德容兼备”译作“both kind and beautiful”,这里的“德”,在芸的心目中就是“心地善良”,婚后如能善待沈复,这是她最为关切的事情。译文虽未深究“德”的含义,对一个普通妇女来说,“德”主要是指“心地”好。这样简单而直白的译文足够了,把原文意思说清楚了。
[原文]言至此,痛肠欲裂,不觉惨然大恸。
[译文]At these words, my body felt as if it were being ripped apart, and I lost control of myself completely, overcome with grief.
抚今追昔,芸之死让沈复肝肠欲断,译文“my body felt as if it were being ripped apart”,充分表达了他的悲痛心情。
嘉庆癸亥三月三十日(1803年5月20日),芸执沈复之手而逝,作者说:
[原文]当是时,孤灯一盏,举目无亲,两手空拳,寸心欲碎,绵绵此恨,曷其有极。
[译文]From that moment, I have been utterly alone;
a solitary lamp, a stranger in a strange place; my lifted eyes seeing no beloved face, my outstretched arms clasping only the empty air.This agony—this heartbreak—will it never end?
译文中的“I have been utterly alone”,是译者的补充;芸死后,沈复感到十分孤独,十分痛苦,译者对作者当时的心情做了这个概括性的描述,后面的细节描写便不觉突兀。
将文学作品译成文学作品,这是文学翻译的境界,也是对译者的挑战。能否“将文学作品译成文学作品”,取决于译者的翻译理念和文字技巧,所谓“翻译理念”,指译者对翻译的认识,以及他面对一个具体作品所采取的翻译策略。而译好一个作品需具备两个前提,一是译者对原文的理解深度,包括对原文的思想感情和语言特征的感觉,这决定译文的深度和语言质量;二是译者的文学修养和审美修养,译者要有语言的审美意识,要知道话如何说、如何写才具有美感。就文学作品翻译而言,只译出原文意思,尽管句法正确,也是远远不够的;文学作品是语言艺术,译文要有美感,要有艺术感染力。这是文学作品翻译成功与否的关键标志。
文学作品原文的故事情节是作者组织起来的,原文的思想感情是作者表达的,译者对原文的情节和思想只有尊重。但在语言的转换上(当然也包括译者对原文作品中文化元素的阐释;但文化因素也是以语言为载体表达出来的),就布莱克所译《浮生六记》而言,在不违背原意的前提下,译者发挥想象,在用英语对原文进行阐释的过程中,也体现了明显的创作倾向,因而使译文具有较强的可读性。
译文中这样的例子多,书里有这样一个情节:
七月望,俗谓之鬼节,芸备小酌,拟邀月畅饮。夜忽阴云如晦,芸愀然曰:“妾能与君白头偕老,月轮当出。”
[原文]余亦索然。但见隔岸萤光,明灭万点,梳织于柳堤蓼渚间。(第一卷)
[译文]I, too, felt depressed and apprehensive, looking across the water to the darkness of the opposite shore, where will-o’-the-wisps, shining in the blackness like thousands of tiny, bright lanterns, wove in and out among the tangled willows.(p.77)
这段原文运用诗一般的语言创造了诗一般的意境。仔细阅读译文,我们感觉也同样具有诗一般的气质。多么简单的用词,多么自然的搭配,多么紧凑的衔接,多么漂亮的组织。这样的译文让我们认识到译者运用英语创造了一个多么神秘莫测的夜景,也让我们认识到,英语和汉语一样,也同样具有如此神奇的表现力。
另外,这里将“萤光”译作“will-o’-the-wisps”,鬼火,也许因为是鬼节,“夜忽阴云如晦,芸愀然”,“余亦索然”,为了结合上下文创造一种神秘气氛,译者可能有意这样译。
译者为译好《浮生六记》,遵循自己提出的三条努力方向,在运用今日英语表达汉语文言文方面下了功夫。其译文不追求字面上和句子形式上的忠实,而追求语义深层和审美层面上尽量与原文保存一致。在布莱克看来,这似乎更为重要,在我们读来,也感觉这很重要。
当然,其他的文学作品未必都可以采取她的这种译法译,其他译家也未必都赞成这样译。但她在翻译中所遵循的几条原则,她所探索的翻译途径,对文学作品的英译有启发,有参考价值。
至于译者在译文中所做的增与减,对原文所做的重新编排,译文中也难免有误译和不妥,这些都可以作为话题,但不在这里讨论了。
完成于农历庚子年三月三十日
【陈芸于嘉庆癸亥年三月三十日(1803)去世,距今日217年整】
[附录]
译文以章节为单位与原文位置对照
译文将原文的四卷分为三部分12章:
第一部分包括7章,第1、2、3、4章来自原文第一卷《闺房记乐》,第5、6两章来自原文第四卷《浪游记快》,第7章来自第一卷《闺房记乐》;
第二部分只有第8章,来自第二卷《闲情记趣》;
第三部分包括第9、10、11、12四章,来自第三卷《坎坷记愁》。
原文每卷都有标题,译文各章没有标题,只有序号。部分内容顺序有变动,部分内容有删节。
Part One
Chapter 1
[译文] I was born in 1763...I understood she was keeping out of my way because she dreaded being ridiculed again on my account.(p.5-23)
[原文]余生乾隆癸未冬十一月二十有二日……再往,芸即避匿,余知其恐贻人笑也。(第一卷《闺房记乐》)
Chapter 2
[译文] Five years were to pass before our wedding candles burned...or so the story goes.(p.25-55)
[原文] 至乾隆庚子正月二十二日花烛之夕……“鸿案相庄”(第一卷 《闺房记乐》)
Chapter 3
[译文] With every passing day, Yuen and I grew more deeply attached to one another...But, despite the beauties of the neighbourhood of the Ts’ang-lang Pavilion, we met no walking parties going in the direction of the gardens.(p.57-87)
[原文]年愈久而情愈密……沧浪亭优雅清旷,反无一人至者。(第一卷 《闺房记乐》)
Chapter 4
[译文] As my father took delight in adopting sons...
Mrs.Lu enjoyed it immensely and had a hearty laugh at herself and her ill-founded suspicions.(p.89-135)
[原文]吾父稼夫喜认义子……鲁大笑,释然而去。(第一卷 《闺房记乐》)
Chapter 5
[译文]While we were living like wandering immortal...After this, we all went back to our lodgings together.(p.137-163)
[原文]迨居萧爽楼,正作烟火神仙……余曰:“无他,恐公等掀衾揭帐耳。”随同归寓。(第四卷《浪游记快》)
Chapter 6
[译文] Several days later, Hsiu-feng and I went tp visit the Sea Pearl Temple...‘After dreaming for six months a Yang-group dream—I awoke, Acquiring a fickle name among the flower boats.’(p.165-187)
[原文]越数日,携秀峰游海珠寺……“半年一觉扬帮梦,赢得花船薄倖名”矣。(第四卷《浪游记快》)
Chapter 7
[译文] In the seventh month of the year of the tiger, 1794, I returned from Kuang-tung...Yuen actually grieved herself to death over the loss of Hanyuan.(p.189-205)
[原文]乾隆甲寅七月,余自粤东归……后憨为有力者夺去,不果,芸竟以之死。(第一卷 《闺房记乐》)
Part Two
Chapter 8
[译文] As a young man I was excessively fond of flowers...When she boiled fresh spring water and made the tea, it had an incomparable fragrance and flavour.(p.207-255)
[原文]及长,爱花成癖……芸用小纱囊撮茶叶少许,置花心,明早取出,烹天泉水泡之,香韵尤绝。(第二卷 《闲情记趣》)
Part Three
Chapter 9
[译文]Why is life so full of sorrow and misfortune?...We had no idea at the time, that the affair of Hanyuan, with all its tragic consequences, lay ahead.(p.257-273)
[原文]人生坎坷,何为乎来哉?……岂料又有憨园之孽障耶。(第三卷《坎坷记愁》)
Chapter 10
[译文]Yuen used to have female troubles...This was their last good-bye for mother and son, who were never to see one another again.(p.275-299)
[原文]芸素有血疾……是行也,其母子已成永诀矣。(第三卷 《坎坷记愁》)
Chapter 11
[译文]Mr.Hua, whose given name was Ta’cheng...
This agony—this heartbreak—will it never end?(p.301-343)
[原文]华名大成……绵绵此恨,曷其有极。(第三卷 《坎坷记愁》)
Chapter 12
[译文]Yuen died on the thirtieth day of the third month of the year of the boar, 1803...a dream from which I don’t know when I shall awaken.(p.345-381)
[原文]承吾友胡肯堂以十金为助……从此扰扰攘攘,又不知梦醒何时耳。(第三卷 《坎坷记愁》)
译文增加的内容:
原文第一卷 《闺房记乐》中,“‘鸿案相庄’。”译文增加了200余字解释“鸿案相庄”典故(p.55)
“鸿案相庄”,典出《后汉书·逸民传·梁鸿》“鸿家贫而有节操。妻孟光,有贤德。每食,光必对鸿举案齐眉,以示敬重。”(淮茗,2010)
原文第一卷《闺房记乐》中,“是年七夕”,译文增加了约110字解释牛郎织女故事(p.59)
此外,原文第一卷 《闺房记乐》中,沈复与陈芸讨论唐诗时,译文增加了两首杜诗。