28 Man's Youth

Thomas Wolfe

Man's youth is a wonderful thing: it is so full of anguish and of magic and he never comes to know it as it is, until it has gone from him forever. It is the thing he cannot bear to lose, it is the thing whose passing he watches with infinite sorrow and regret, it is the thing whose loss he must lament forever, and it is the thing whose loss he really welcomes with a sad and secret joy, the thing he would never willingly relive again, could it be restored to him by any magic.

Why is this? The reason is that the strange and bitter miracle of life is nowhere else so evident as in our youth. And what is the essence of that strange and bitter miracle of life which we feel so poignant , so unutterable , with such a bitter pain and joy, when we are young? It is this: that being rich, we are so poor; that being mighty, we can yet have nothing; that seeing, breathing, smelling, tasting all around us the impossible wealth and glory of this earth, feeling with an intolerable certitude that the whole structure of the enchanted life—the most fortunate, wealthy, good, and happy life that any man has ever known—is ours—is ours at once, immediately and forever, the moment that we choose to take a step, or stretch a hand, or say a word—we yet know that we can really keep, hold, take, and possess forever—nothing. All passes; nothing lasts: the moment that we put our hand upon it, it melts away like smoke, is gone forever, and the snake is eating at our heart again; we see then what we are and what our lives must come to.

A young man is so strong, so mad, so certain, and so lost. He has everything and he is able to use nothing. He hurls the great shoulder of his strength forever against phantasmal barriers, he is a wave whose power explodes in lost mid-oceans under timeless skies, he reaches out to grip a fume of painted smoke, he wants all, feels the thirst and power for everything, and finally gets nothing. In the end, he is destroyed by his own strength, devoured by his own hunger, impoverished by his own wealth. Thoughtless of money or the accumulation of material possessions, he is none the less defeated in the end by his own greed; a greed that makes the avarice of King Midas seem paltry by comparison.

And that is the reason why, when youth is gone, every man will look back upon that period of his life with infinite sorrow and regret. It is the bitter sorrow and regret of a man who knows that once he had a great talent and wasted it, of a man who knows that once he had a great treasure and got nothing from it, of a man who knows that he had strength enough for everything and never used it.

难词释义

poignant [ˈpɔɪnjənt] adj. 令人沉痛的；悲惨的；酸楚的

unutterable [ʌnˈʌtərəbl] adj. 难以言表的；说不出的

certitude [ˈsɜːrtɪtuːd] n. 确信；确定；确实的事

enchanted [ɪnˈtʃæntɪd] adj. 极乐的；施过魔法的

phantasmal [fænˈtæzml] adj. 幻影的；幽灵的；空想的

devour [dɪˈvaʊər] v. 吞没；吞噬；毁灭

avarice [ˈævərɪs] n. （对钱财的）贪婪，贪心，贪得无厌

paltry [ˈpɔːltri] adj. 无价值的；无用的

青春

托马斯·沃尔夫

人的青春奇妙无穷，充满痛楚，充满魔力。青春年少时不知青春为何物，无奈青春一去不复返时才恍然醒悟：青春是谁也不愿失去的东西；眼睁睁看着青春流逝，无限的感伤和遗憾涌上心头；青春的流逝是人们心中永远的痛；青春的流逝让人们或大悲或窃喜；即便魔力可以还以青春，人们也不愿再次经历那些流逝的青春岁月。

为什么会这样呢？因为青春时代的生活充满了奇特、心酸的生命奇迹。当青春年少的我们怀着或悲或喜的心情，强烈而又不可名状地体味着那些生活的奇特辛酸时，我们可曾想过它的本质？它的本质就是：我们富足殷实，却无比贫穷；我们力大无穷，却一无所有；世间的富贵荣华比比皆是，可以看到，闻到，尝到，甚至呼吸到，我们深信不疑，整个似乎被施了魔法的生活——那人类所知道的最幸运、最富有、最美好、最幸福的生活——是属于我们的，只要我们向前迈出一步，伸出一只手，说上一句话，它便立刻属于我们了，而且将永远属于我们。然而我们也知道，其实我们留不住、抓不着、拿不走也无法占有什么。一切转瞬即逝。我们一伸手，它便像云烟般消失不见了。于是，痛苦再一次啃噬我们的心，我们认识了自己，也明白了生活必将归于何处。

青年人非常强壮、狂热、自信，却很容易迷茫；他拥有一切，却又无法把握；他身强体壮，总想要冲破虚幻的障碍，它的力量像海浪炸裂在永恒天空下迷失的大海中央；他伸出双手想要抓住色彩斑斓的云烟，他想得到一切，渴望主宰一切，可到头来依旧两手空空，一无所获；最后，他被自己的力量打败，被自己的饥饿吞噬，因自己的财富而穷困。他对金钱和财富的积累不以为意，最终却被贪婪所吞噬，那是一种连能够点石成金的迈达斯王都相形见绌的贪婪。

这就是为什么当青春消逝，回首过往时，每个人的心中总会充满无限的忧伤和遗憾。曾经杰出的才能，却白白浪费了；曾经殷实的财富，却被挥霍一空；曾经满身的本领，却未好好利用。一个明白了这些道理的人，回忆起青春时代，总会充满忧伤和懊悔。