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教育类范文三
新生下乡应该缓行

In many countries good schools and medical facilities are available only in cities. Some people think that university graduates who become new teachers and doctors should work in rural areas for a few years. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

在很多国家,只有在城市里才能找到好的学校和医疗设施。一些人认为那些刚从大学毕业的新医生和新教师应该在乡村先工作几年。多大程度上你同意或不同意?

说明

目前我们已经看到了官方标准中的6分与7分作文,对考官的期望值有了一定的“感性认识”。那么分数夹在它们之间的作文又应该是什么样儿呢?

下面我们来深入研究一篇6.5分范文,6.5也正是多数二三线英联邦大学对研究生入学要求的分数。不妨把您自己的作文与这篇文章来做一个对照的评判,并请认真体会: What does it take to get a band 6.5

▶6.5分范文

There is still a wide gap between the educational and medical facilities in urban and rural areas. Having seen this, some people suggest that new teachers and doctors work in the rural area for some time. I think this may lead to some practical problems.

I agree that sending new teachers and doctors to the rural area may help them to develop a strong sense of responsibility. They will feel it is a pity that the rural residents suffer from poor teaching and medical services , and they have the responsibility to change the situation. Their knowledge and skills gained through higher education can help them to contribute to improvements in local education and health care.

However, sending university graduates to rural areas can also cause significant problems. Many of them will feel frustrated if they are forced to work in areas where they may have difficulty adapting to the local lifestyles. Even if they can finally get used to the underdeveloped facilities there, they will find it difficult to readapt to the life in cities when they come back. Much pressure will also be felt if they return to cities but have problems operating the teaching tools or medical equipment in cities, which are more advanced and harder to use. These teachers and doctors may even think of themselves as complete failures because they may be unable to keep up with their colleagues after spending some time in rural areas.

To conclude, I tend to believe that new teachers' and new doctors' own choices should be respected when they are asked to work in rural areas.

词汇和短语

(标★的是本类话题的高频词汇或短语)

★ educational and medical facilities 教育和医疗设施

★ underdeveloped facilities 不发达的、落后的设施

practical adj. 实际的

★ rural resident 农村居民

medical services 医疗服务

★ frustrated adj. 沮丧的,有挫败感的

adapt to sth. v. 适应

a strong sense of responsibility 强烈的责任感

★ readapt to sth. v. 重新适应

colleague n. 同事

Pat 评析

一篇十分中规中矩的文章,没有很强的表现欲,ideas也并不算新颖,但说理还是清楚的(本文不算长,但好处是基本没有废话,ideas读起来还是比较充实的),行文过程整体也比较连贯,没有6分作文那样时常出现的“磕磕绊绊”感。

文中先承认了新老师和医生下乡的好处:培养责任感和利用自己的知识与技能为当地发展做贡献,但接着给出了更多的坏处,包括: 年轻人离开城市后可能难以适应, 今后回城再适应也会有困难, 事业的发展不连续等。

该考生的最后结论是:是否让新老师和医生下乡应该尊重他们/她们自己的选择,这一结论并不深刻,但也还是有说服力的。

语法多样性分析

Many of them will feel frustrated if they are forced to work in areas where they may have difficulty adapting to the local lifestyles. Even if they can finally get used to the underdeveloped facilities there,they will find it difficult to readapt to the life in cities when they come back. 这两句话里分别用到了if和even if,请注意它们在逻辑含义上的细节差异:if表示“如果”,而even if则是表示“即使”

【剑桥例句】 Even if you take a taxi you will still miss the train.

本文量化评分

■译文

在教育和医疗设施方面,城乡之间仍然存在着较大差距。因此,有些人建议让新教师和新医生在农村工作一段时间。我认为这可能会导致一些实际的问题。

我承认,把新老师和新医生送到农村,可能会帮助他们培养强烈的责任感。他们中的一些人会为农村居民落后的教学和医疗服务感到遗憾,并认为自己有责任去改变这种状况。他们通过高等教育学到的知识和技能可以帮助他们为农村教育和医疗的改善做出贡献。

但是,将大学毕业生送到农村也可能会产生显著的问题。假如他们被迫在其很难适应当地生活方式的贫困地区工作,他们中的许多人都会感到受挫。即使他们最终习惯了那里的落后设施,当回到城市时,他们也会发现几乎不可能重新适应那里的生活了。如果他们回到城市却在操作城市里的教学工具或医疗设备时遇到困难,因为那些设备更先进,使用难度更大,他们 会感到很大的压力。这些教师和医生 甚至 可能认为自己完全是个失败者,因为在农村待了一段时间后,他们可能已无法跟上同行。

总之,我倾向于认为在要求新教师和新医生到农村工作时,应尊重其个人的选择。 bSRAKsZMZPWuoaRLRbQHsJ8DNoDtzGcOt11iiUu4GJIEVzVqD/9pzAoJPim3r+8y

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