| To Chinese Readers |

In my role as a bereavement counsellor I have sat in my small room in West London for decades,and met people who are bereaved,from many corners of the world.I remember a young Chinese woman who was grieving the death of her daughter,whose silence told me more than her words.She would sit opposite me,her head down,no tears running down her cheeks,but transmitting great waves of loss for her little girl.I realised anew how grief is invisible,and we may all show it in different ways；but the experience of the loss is similar between one person to another,wherever their place of birth maybe.

For that reason I could not be more excited that my book is being published in China,a country I have great respect for.It does feel like a kind of magic that my words can travel across the world to you.As I write to you now,I imagine with great pride,you reading my book,and I want to wave hello.I would like to know more about you,where you live,what you do,what has happened that has led you to read my book.I hope it will connect to you,in the way I intended when I wrote it；to help you understand yourself by reading the stories of others,and perhaps more importantly,realising that whilst grief is a lonely painful business,if we reach to our family and friends we can find a way of bearing it.Whilst we will always remember the person who has died,over time,we can find love and joy in life again.

Across the thousands of miles between us,I hope you hear my voice,and return to my words in the years ahead,perhaps to revisit a particular section,or remind yourself what you can do that helps.Maybe you will give it to a friend,and it will console them,in turn.

Above all my wish is that this book answers your hopes for it,when you bought it.

I send you my warm best wishes.

Julia Samuel
London,June 2018