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第四章
No man likes to acknowledge that he has made a mistake in the choice of his profession, and every man worthy of the name will row long against wind and tide before he allows himself to cry out, 'I am baffled! ' and submits to be floated passively back to land. From the first week of my residence in X-I felt my occupation irksome. The thing itself-the work of copying and translating business letters was a dry and tedious task enough, but had that been all I should long have borne with the nuisance. I am not of an impatient nature, and, influenced by the double desire of getting my living and justifying to myself and others the resolution I had taken to become a tradesman, I should have endured in silence the rust and cramp of my best faculties. I should not have whispered, even inwardly, that I longed for liberty. I should have pent in every sigh by which my heart might have ventured to intimate its distress under the closeness, smoke, monotony, and joyless tumult of Bigben Close, and its panting desire for freer and fresher scenes. I should have set up the image of Duty, the fetish of Perseverance, in my small bedroom at Mrs. King's lodgings, and they two should have been my household gods, from which my darling, my cherished-in-secret, Imagination, the tender and the mighty, should never, either by softness or strength, have severed me. But this was not all. The antipathy which had sprung up between myself and my employer striking deeper root and spreading denser shade daily, excluded me from every glimpse of the sunshine of life; and I began to feel like a plant growing in humid darkness out of the slimy walls of a well.
没有人愿意承认自己选错了职业，每个真正的人总要在与风浪搏斗一番后才会喊： ‘我不行了！’ 然后才听天由命地漂回陆地。从我住在X镇的第一个星期起，我就觉得自己的职业令人厌烦。工作本身--抄写和翻译商业信函--已经足够枯燥无味了，但如果是仅仅仅如此，我也会长期忍受这份令人厌倦的工作。我并不是一个天生缺乏耐心的人，况且，在两重欲望--一是为了维持生计，一是为了给自己、也给别人证明我成为商人的决心--的影响下，我本应该默默忍受自己最杰出的才能被埋没、被限制。我不应该喃喃自语，说自己渴望自由，甚至内心也不应该有此想法。在狭窄闭塞、烟雾缭绕、单调无趣、吵吵闹闹的比格本大院，我的内心可能会冒险流露出痛苦忧郁，以及对更自由、更清新的环境的强烈渴望，我应该压制每一次这样的叹息。我应该请来责任之神和毅力之神，把它们当成我的家神供奉在我在金太太的寄宿宿舍租的小卧室里。这样我那亲爱的、私下里很珍视的脆弱或强大的幻想，不管软磨还是硬逼，也绝不会让我改变。但境况比这更糟糕。我和雇主之间所产生的厌恶越积越深，阴影日益浓厚，使我的生活见不到一丝阳光。我开始觉得自己像一颗长在黏湿的井壁上的植物，周围一片潮湿，暗无光日。
Antipathy is the only word which can express the feeling Edward Crimsworth had for me-a feeling, in a great measure, involuntary, and which was liable to be excited by every, the most trifling, movement, look, or word of mine. My southern accent annoyed him; the degree of education evinced in my language irritated him; my punctuality, industry, and accuracy fixed his dislike, and gave it the high flavour and poignant relish of envy; he feared that I too should one day make a successful tradesman. Had I been in anything inferior to him, he would not have hated me so thoroughly; but I knew all that he knew, and, what was worse, he suspected that I kept the padlock of silence on mental wealth in which he was no sharer. If he could have once placed me in a ridiculous or mortifying position, he would have forgiven me much, but I was guarded by three faculties-caution, tact, observation; and prowling and prying as was Edward's malignity, it could never baffle the lynX-eyes of these, my natural sentinels. Day by day did his malice watch my tact, hoping it would sleep, and prepared to steal snake-like on its slumber; but tact, if it be genuine, never sleeps.
爱德华·克利姆斯沃思对我的感情只能用厌恶这个词来形容--这种感情多半是无意识流露出来的。我的每一个最细微的动作、每个表情或每句话都有可能激起他的厌恶。我的南方口音惹恼了他；我的语言能力体现了我的教育程度，这也激怒了他；我上班守时、工作勤快、做事的准确也招致了他的讨厌，让他对我更加憎恨，并产生了极其浓烈的嫉妒心；他唯恐我日后也成为一名成功的商人。假如我有一方面比他差，他也不至于那么恨我；但是我掌握了所有他掌握的知识，更糟糕的是，他怀疑我悄悄锁着自己的精神财富，不与他分享。如果他有一次可以将我置于荒谬或受辱的境地，他或许会大大宽恕我，但是我有三大能力护身--谨慎、机智、善于观察；尽管爱德华居心叵测地暗中打探我，却从未逃脱过我这些天然哨兵的锐利的眼睛。他每日都心怀敌意地监视着我，希望我的机警能沉睡，这样他便可以趁机像毒蛇一般偷袭我；但是真正的机警是永远都不会有沉睡的时候。
I had received my first quarter's wages, and was returning to my lodgings, possessed heart and soul with the pleasant feeling that the master who had paid me grudged every penny of that hard-earned pittance. (I had long ceased to regard Mr. Crimsworth as my brother. He was a hard, grinding master. He wished to be an inexorable tyrant, that was all. ) Thoughts, not varied but strong, occupied my mind. Two voices spoke within me; again and again they uttered the same monotonous phrases. One said, 'William, your life is intolerable. ' The other, 'What can you do to alter it? ' I walked fast, for it was a cold, frosty night in January. As I approached my lodgings, I turned from a general view of my affairs to the particular speculation as to whether my fire would be out. Looking towards the window of my sitting-room, I saw no cheering red gleam.
我领到第一季度的薪水后，我正要回到住所，满心欣喜，因为我的雇主对我辛苦挣的微薄收入的一分一毫都给得不情不愿。（我很早以前便不把克利姆斯沃思先生当哥哥了。他是个冷酷的、压榨工人的雇主。他希望自己是个无情专横的人，仅此而已。）简单但是强烈的思想占据了我的头脑。两种声音在我的内心响起；它们一次又一次重复着同样的话语。一个声音说： “威廉，你的生活是不堪忍受的。” 另一个声音说： “你能做什么改变这种生活？” 这是一月份的一个严寒霜冻的的晚上，我走得很快。快要走到住所时，我的思绪从对事情的宏观考虑转移到了对细节的思考：我的炉火是否已经灭了。我朝客厅的窗户望去，没看见有令人振奋的红色的光芒在闪耀。
'That slut of a servant has neglected it as usual, ' said I, 'and I shall see nothing but pale ashes if I go in. It is a fine starlight night; I will walk a little farther. '
“那懒婆娘仆人又像往常一样忘记烧火了，” 我自言自语道， “我进去看不到别的，只能看到白白的灰烬。今晚星光灿烂，很不错。我再多走走吧。”
It was a fine night, and the streets were dry and even clean for X-. There was a crescent curve of moonlight to be seen by the parish church tower, and hundreds of stars shone keenly bright in all quarters of the sky.
今晚天气晴朗，街道地面干燥，对X镇来说，甚至是干净的了。可以看见教区教堂的塔边挂着一弯新月，月光闪烁，四周天空中繁星密布，亮晶晶地闪耀着。
Unconsciously I steered my course towards the country. I had got into Grove Street, and began to feel the pleasure of seeing dim trees at the extremity, round a suburban house when a person leaning over the iron gate of one of the small gardens which front the neat dwelling-houses in this street addressed me as I was hurrying with quick stride past.
不知不觉中我走向了郊区。我已经来到格罗夫大街，看到街道尽头环抱着郊区房屋的朦胧的树木，不禁心感愉悦，这条街道整齐的住宅前面有几个的小花园，一个人依靠在其中一个花园的铁门上。我迈着快步匆匆走过时，那人对我说起话来。
'What the deuce is the hurry? Just so must Lot have left Sodom, when he expected fire to pour down upon it out of burning brass clouds. '
“怎么这么匆忙？当年洛特料想到燃烧的黄铜云要倾泻而下，降大火于所多玛城时，他肯定也是如此匆忙地逃离此城。”
I stopped short, and looked towards the speaker. I smelt the fragrance and saw the red spark of a cigar. The dusk outline of a man, too, bent towards me over the wicket.
我马上停了下来，望向讲话的人。我闻到香烟的味道，然后又看到香烟的红色火花。同时我看到一个男子模糊的轮廓正对着我倚在小门上。
'You see I am meditating in the field at eventide, ' continued this shade. 'God knows it's cool work, especially as instead of Rebecca on a camel's hump, with bracelets on her arms and a ring in her nose, Fate sends me only a counting-house clerk, in a gray tweed wrapper. '
“你瞧，日暮时分我正在田间沉思呢。” 这个身影继续说道。 “上帝知道这是多么枯燥的事啊！尤其是这可不像丽贝卡戴着手镯、鼻环骑在骆驼背上，上帝只给我一个以灰色斜纹软呢遮体的账房秘书职位。”
The voice was familiar to me. Its second utterance enabled me to seize the speaker's identity.
这声音听起来很熟悉。从第二句话我听出来说话的是谁了。
'Mr. Hunsden! Good-evening. '
“亨斯登先生！晚上好！”
'Good-evening, indeed! Yes, but you would have passed me without recognition if I had not been so civil as to speak first. '
“晚上确实很好！如果我不是如此礼貌地与你搭话，恐怕你经过我身边都不知道我是谁。”
'I did not know you. '
“我没认出你来。”
'A famous excuse! You ought to have known me. I knew you, though you were going ahead like a steam-engine. Are the police after you? '
“这借口太常见了！你应该认得出我。我认得你，即使你正像蒸汽机般往前走着。有警察在后面追你吗？”
'It wouldn't be worth their while; I' m not of consequence enough to attract them. '
“我不值得他们浪费时间，我不是什么重要人物，不足以吸引他们。”
'Alas, poor shepherd! Alack and well-a-day! What a theme for regret, and how down in the mouth you must be judging from the sound of your voice! But since you're not running from the police, from whom are you running? The devil?
“唉，可怜的牧羊人！啊，天啊！多么懊丧的话！从你说话的声音来判断，你肯定很沮丧！但是你既然不是逃避警察，那你又是在逃避谁呢？魔鬼吗？”
'On the contrary, I am going post to him. '
“恰恰相反，我正追捕魔鬼呢。”
'That is well; you're just in luck. This is Tuesday evening. There are scores of market gigs and carts returning to Dinneford tonight, and he, or some of his, have a seat in all regularly; so, if you'll step in and sit half an hour in my bachelor's parlour, you may catch him as he passes without much trouble. I think, though, you'd better let him alone to-night, he'll have so many customers to serve. Tuesday is his busy day in X-and Dinneford. Come in, at all events. '
“很好。你运气很好。现在是周二晚上。今晚有许多赶集的双轮马车和手推车要返回迪尼福特，每辆车上一定坐着魔鬼或者魔鬼手下的小鬼；所以，如果你进来到我那单身汉客厅坐上半小时，你不费吹灰之力就可以看到他。不过，我想今晚你就放过他吧，他有很多客户要招待。周二他在X镇和迪尼福特都很忙。不管怎样，进来吧。”
He swung the wicket open as he spoke.
他边说边把门打开了。
'Do you really wish me to go in? ' I asked.
“你真想让我进去吗？” 我问道。
'As you please. I' m alone. Your company for an hour or two would be agreeable to me; but if you don't choose to favour me so far, I'll not press the point. I hate to bore any one. '
“随你的便。我就一个人。你要能陪我一两个小时，我很高兴；如果你不肯，我也不强求。我讨厌烦到别人。”
It suited me to accept the invitation as it suited Hunsden to give it. I passed through the gate, and followed him to the front door, which he opened; thence we traversed a passage, and entered his parlour. The door being shut, he pointed me to an arm-chair by the hearth. I sat down and glanced round me.
接受邀请正合我意，这也正合亨斯登先生的意思。我穿过大门，跟着他来到前门。他打开前门，我们从那里穿过一个过道，进入他的客厅。他关上客厅门，并指了指炉边的扶手椅。我坐了下来，并看了看四周。
It was a comfortable room, at once snug and handsome. The bright grate was filled with a genuine-shire fire, red, clear, and generous-no penurious South-of-England embers heaped in the corner of a grate. On the table a shaded lamp diffused around a soft, pleasant, and equal light. The furniture was almost luxurious for a young bachelor, comprising a couch and two very easy chairs; bookshelves filled the recesses on each side of the mantelpiece; they were well furnished, and arranged with perfect order. The neatness of the room suited my taste; I hate irregular and slovenly habits. From what I saw I concluded that Hunsden's ideas on that point corresponded with my own. While he removed from the centre table to the sideboard a few pamphlets and periodicals, I ran my eye along the shelves of the book-ease nearest me. French and German works predominated-the old French dramatists, sundry modern authors, Thiers, Villemain, Paul de Kock, George Sand, Eugene Sue; in German-Goethe, Schiller, Zschokke, Jean Paul Richter; in English there were works on political economy. I examined no further, for Mr. Hunsden himself recalled my attention.
房间很舒服，既舒适又美观。明亮的火炉内燃烧着名副其实的X镇之火--通红、透亮、大气--不像英国吝啬的南方人，烧过的灰烬还要堆积在壁炉的角落里。桌上有盏罩灯，散发出柔、温馨而又均匀的光。屋内摆着一张沙发和两张十分舒适的椅子，壁炉架两旁凹陷的地方嵌着书架；书架上摆满了东西，井井有条；这样的家具摆设对一个年轻单身汉来说，可以算得上是奢侈豪华。房间干净整洁，符合我的品位；我讨厌无规律、散漫的生活习惯。就我所见，我断言亨斯登先生的在这方面的想法与我的是一致的。他从中间的桌子上挪动一些小册子和杂志到餐具柜上时，我扫了一眼离我最近的书架。主要是一些法国和德国的作品--有古老的法国戏剧家的作品，还有各种各样的现代作家作品，如梯也尔、维尔曼、保尔? 德科克、乔治? 桑和欧仁? 休等人的作品；德国的作家诸如歌德、席勒、乔克、让? 保罗? 里希特的作品；还有英文作品，是关于政治经济学的。由于亨斯登先生叫我，我没再看到什么了。
'You shall have something, ' said he, 'for you ought to feel disposed for refreshment after walking nobody knows how far on such a Canadian night as this; but it shall not be brandy-and-water, and it shall not be a bottle of port, nor ditto of sherry. I keep no such poison. I have Rhein-wein for my own drinking, and you may choose between that and coffee.
“你该喝点东西。” 他说道， “在这个加拿大式的晚上没人知道你走了多远，你现在应该会想喝点东西来提提神。我给你喝的既不是加水白兰地也不是波尔图葡萄酒或雪利酒。我这儿可没这些毒药。我自己喝莱茵白葡萄酒，你可以在它和咖啡之间选择。
Here again Hunsden suited me. If there was one generally received practice I abhorred more than another, it was the habitual imbibing of spirits and strong wines. I had, however, no fancy for his acid German nectar, but I liked coffee, so I responded, -
亨斯登先生的安排又一次合我的意。如果说有一种人们普遍能接受的习惯，而我却比讨厌其他东西更讨厌它的话，那就是常饮烈酒。不过，我对那酸酸的德国佳酿没兴趣，但我喜欢咖啡，所以，我回答说--
'Give me some coffee, Mr. Hunsden. '
“给我一杯咖啡，亨斯登先生。”
I perceived my answer pleased him. He had doubtless expected to see a chilling effect produced by his steady announcement that he would give me neither wine nor spirits; he just shot one searching glance at my face to ascertain whether my cordiality was genuine or a mere feint of politeness. I smiled, because I quite understood him; and, while I honoured his conscientious firmness, I was amused at his mistrust. He seemed satisfied, rang the bell, and ordered coffee, which was presently brought; for himself, a bunch of grapes and half a pint of something sour sufficed. My coffee was excellent. I told him so, and expressed the shuddering pity with which his anchorite fare inspired me. He did not answer and I scarcely think heard my remark. At that moment one of those momentary eclipses I before alluded to had come over his face, extinguishing his smile, and replacing, by an abstracted and alienated look, the customarily shrewd, bantering glance of his eye. I employed the interval of silence in a rapid scrutiny of his physiognomy. I had never observed him closely before, and, as my sight is very short, I had gathered only a vague, general idea of his appearance. I was surprised now, on examination, to perceive how small and even feminine were his lineaments. His tall figure, long and dark locks, his voice and general bearing, had impressed me with the notion of something powerful and massive. Not at all. My own features were cast in a harsher and squarer mould than his. I discerned that there would be contrasts between his inward and outward man-contentions too, for I suspected his soul had more of will and ambition than his body had of fibre and muscle. Perhaps in these incompatibilities of the 'physique' with the 'morale' lay the secret of that fitful gloom. He would but could not, and the athletic mind scowled scorn on its more fragile companion. As to his good looks, I should have liked to have a woman's opinion on that subject. It seemed to me that his face might produce the same effect on a lady that a very piquant and interesting though scarcely pretty female face would on a man. I have mentioned his dark locks-they were brushed sideways above a white and sufficiently expansive forehead; his cheek had a rather hectic freshness; his features might have done well on canvas but indifferently in marble. They were plastic; character had set a stamp upon each; expression recast them at her pleasure, and strange metamorphoses she wrought, giving him now the mien of a morose bull, and anon that of an arch and mischievous girl; more frequently the two semblances were blent, and a queer, composite countenance they made.
我发现我的回答使他愉快。他肯定原以为坚持不给我葡萄酒或烈酒会使我有些扫兴。他朝我的脸瞥了一眼，研究着我的热情是发自内心还是佯装礼貌。我笑了笑，因为我十分清楚他是怎么想的。而尽管我尊重他煞费苦心的坚持，却也对他的多疑感到好笑。他似乎很满意，按铃给我叫了咖啡，咖啡很快便端了上来；他自己则要了一串葡萄和半品托很酸的东西。咖啡味道好极了。我把这点告诉了他，并表示他隐士般的饮食触发了我对他的深深的同情。他没有回答，我差点以为他没听到我说的话。我之前提及过的短暂的沮丧爬上了他的脸庞，笑容消失了，一种心不在焉的、生疏的表情取而代之，眼睛里露露出一贯的狡诈与嘲弄的眼神。我趁这沉默的片刻，迅速审视他的外貌。我以往从没仔细观察过他，而且，我近视很严重，对他的外貌总共就了解了个模糊的总体特征。我对自己的审视吃了一惊，现在才发现原来他的脸庞狭小，轮廓甚至有些女人气。他身材高大，头发又黑又长，他的声音和总体的举止一直给我一种强壮魁梧的印象。其实不然。我自己的外貌与他相比就显得更粗犷、更魁梧。我看得出来，他的内心与他的有对比--也有矛盾，我想虽然他身体的肌肉并不发达，但他的灵魂具有足够的毅力与志向。也许在 ‘肉体’ 和 ‘精神’ 这两个对立面中隐藏着他那种间歇性忧郁的秘密。他心有余而力不足，强健的灵魂怒视着虚弱的身躯。至于他英俊的外貌，我倒想听听女士的看法。在我看来，似乎他的容貌在女士心中的引起的反响很可能和一位长得不漂亮，但是活泼风趣的女子在男士心中引起的反响一样。我刚提到他黑色的头发--梳在白皙又十分宽阔的前额两侧；他的脸颊通红，气色饱满；他的容貌若要描绘于画布上则栩栩如生，但若用大理石雕刻则会显得毫无生气。他的容貌易于塑形；每个器官都铭刻着他的个性；可以随心所欲得重新雕饰他的面部表情，雕饰出各种怪异的变体，让他时而像头脾气暴躁的公牛，时而又像个调皮淘气的小姑娘；更多时候像这两种形象的结合，一种奇异的混合表情。
Starting from his silent fit, he began, -
沉默一阵之后，他开始说起来--
'William, what a fool you are to live in those dismal lodgings of Mrs. King's, when you might take rooms here in Grove Street, and have a garden like me! '
“威廉，你尽可以像我一样住在格罗夫大街，有个像我的花园一样的花园，干嘛要住在金太太那阴暗的寄宿宿舍里，多傻啊！”
'I should be too far from the mill. '
“那我离工厂就太远了。”
'What of that? It would do you good to walk there and back two or three times a day; besides, are you such a fossil that you never wish to see a flower or a green leaf? '
“那又怎么样？每天来回走两三次对你有好处；而且难道你是一块石头，从不想看看红花绿叶吗？”
'I am no fossil. '
“我不是石头。”
'What are you then? You sit at that desk in Crimsworth's counting-house day by day and week by week, scraping with a pen on paper, just like an automaton. You never get up; you never say you are tired; you never ask for a holiday; you never take change or relaxation; you give way to no excess of an evening; you neither keep wild company nor indulge in strong drink. '
“那你是什么？你坐在克利姆斯沃思的账房里，日复一日，周复一周，用笔在纸上沙沙写着，就像一个机器人。你从未站起身；从不说累；从不请假；从不改变生活或放松一下；从不肯放纵一个晚上；也不滥交朋友或酗酒。”
'Do you, Mr. Hunsden? '
“那你这么做吗，亨斯登先生？”
'Don't think to pose me with short questions. Your case and mine are diametrically different, and it is nonsense attempting to draw a parallel. I say that when a man endures patiently what ought to be unendurable, he is a fossil. '
“别以为你可以用这些唐突的问题难住我。你的情况和我的完全不同，试图把我们相提并论是很愚蠢的。照我说，一个耐心地忍受着不该忍受的人，他就是一块石头。”
'Whence do you acquire a knowledge of my patience? '
“你怎么知道我的耐性怎么样呢？”
'Why, man, do you suppose you are a mystery? The other night you seemed surprised at my knowing to what family you belonged; now you find subject for wonderment in my calling you patient. What do you think I do with my eyes and ears? I've been in your counting-house more than once when Crimsworth has treated you like a dog-called for a book, for instance, and when you gave him the wrong one, or what he chose to consider the wrong one, flung it back almost in your face; desired you to shut or open the door as if you had been his flunkey-to say nothing of your position at the party about a month ago, where you had neither place nor partner, but hovered about like a poor, shabby hanger-on. And how patient you were under each and all of these circumstances'
“哈，伙计，你以为你是个谜？那天晚上你对我知道你的身世感到惊讶；现在你又对我说你耐心感到惊讶。你以为我的眼睛和耳朵干什么用的？我不止一次在账房看到克利斯沃思像对一条狗一样对你--例如，当你拿错书给他的时候，或者他认为你拿错了他就扔过去，几乎是砸到你脸上；他像奴隶般使唤你，叫你关门开门--一个月前的晚会上你的处境就不提了，既没有位子也没有舞伴，你就像一个可怜落魄的食客随从徘徊左右。在这所有的、每一次的处境中，你是如此有耐性啊。”
'Well, Mr. Hunsden, what then? '
“嗯，亨斯登先生，那又怎么样？”
'I can hardly tell you what then, the conclusion to be drawn as to your character depends upon the nature of the motives which guide your conduct. If you are patient because you expect to make something eventually out of Crimsworth notwithstanding his tyranny, or perhaps by means of it, you are what the world calls an interested and mercenary but may be a very wise fellow; if you are patient because you think it a duty to meet insult with submission, you are an essential sap and in no shape the man for my money; if you are patient because your nature is phlegmatic, flat, inexcitable, and that you cannot get up to the pitch of resistance, why, God made you to be crushed; and lie down by all means, and he flat, and let Juggernaut ride well over you. '
“我就很难说清楚那会怎样，关于你性格的结论取决于指引你行为的动机的性质。尽管克利姆斯沃思专制暴虐，如果你忍气吞声只是想最终从他那里得到什么，或想通过他的暴虐获取什么，你就是世人所说的唯利是图之辈，但也是个颇为聪明的人；如果你忍耐是因为你觉得你应该这样逆来顺受，那你就是十足的笨蛋，依我看你也不配做人；如果你忍耐是因为你生性冷淡平庸、难以激动，从而不奋起反抗，唉，上帝让你生来就要受人践踏，你干脆平躺下来任凭讫哩什那神车从身上碾过去。”
Mr. Hunsden's eloquence was not, it will be perceived, of the smooth and oily order. As he spoke he pleased me ill. I seem to recognize in him one of those characters who, sensitive enough themselves, are selfishly relentless towards the sensitiveness of others. Moreover, though he was neither like Crimsworth nor Lord Tynedale, yet he was acrid, and, I suspected, overbearing in his way. There was a tone of despotism in the urgency of the very reproaches by which he aimed at goading the oppressed into rebellion against the oppressor. Looking at him still more fixedly than I had yet done, I saw written in his eye and mien a resolution to arrogate to himself a freedom so unlimited that it might often trench on the just liberty of his neighbours. I rapidly ran over these thoughts, and then I laughed a low and involuntary laugh, moved thereto by a slight inward revelation of the inconsistency of man. It was as I thought. Hunsden had expected me to take with calm his incorrect and offensive surmises, his bitter and haughty taunts, and himself was chafed by a laugh scarce louder than a whisper.
你会发觉，其实亨斯登先生的话语并非油腔滑调。他说的时候，我感到不快。我似乎从他身上看到其中一种人，他们自己十分敏感，却很自私，对他人的敏感毫无怜悯之心。另外，虽说他既不像克利姆斯沃思也不像泰尼德尔男爵，但是他言语刻薄，而且在我看来，他这样做显得傲慢自大。他急切地激励被压迫者起来反抗压迫者时，那责备意味十足的话语中带有专制的语气。我更专注地凝视着他，从他眼睛和神态里，看到了一种为了争取自己的自由可以做任何事情的决心，甚至不惜侵犯别人的自由。我脑袋里迅速浮现出这些想法，接着我不由自主地轻声笑了笑，对人类内心显露的自相矛盾的心理感触良多。这正是我想的。亨斯登先生以为我会平静地接受他错误的、冒犯的猜测和他傲慢尖刻的嘲弄，所以，他被我那比耳语大不了多少的笑声惹火了。
His brow darkened, his thin nostril dilated a little.
他的眉毛阴沉下来，小小的鼻孔张大了些许。
'Yes, ' he began, 'I told you that you were an aristocrat, and who but an aristocrat would laugh such a laugh as that and look such a look-a laugh frigidly jeering, a look lazily mutinous, gentlemanlike irony, patrician resentment? What a nobleman you would have made, William Crimsworth! You are cut out for one; pity Fortune has balked Nature! Look at the features, figure, even to the hands; distinction all over-ugly distinction! Now, if you'd only an estate, and a mansion, and a park, and a title, how you could play the exclusive, maintain the rights of your class, train your tenantry in habits of respect to the peerage, oppose at every step the advancing power of the people, support your rotten order, and be ready for its sake to wade knee-deep in churls' blood. As it is, you've no power; you can do nothing; you're wrecked and stranded on the shores of commerce, forced into collision with practical men, with whom you cannot cope, for you'll never be a tradesman. '
“不错，” 他接着说道， “我说过你是贵族出身，不然还有谁会那么笑，有谁会有那样的目光--嘲弄般的冷笑，不卑不亢的反叛的目光，还有这绅士般的讽刺，贵族式的怨恨？你本可以成为一名贵族，威廉·克利姆斯沃思！你生来就是这块料；可怜的命运阻碍了天性！看你这容貌、身材，再看看你的手，处处都与众不同--令人讨厌的与众不同！现在只要你有财产，有豪宅、公园和头衔，你就可以行使特权，维护阶级的利益，训练你的佃农养成对贵族卑躬屈膝的习惯，反对日渐强大的人民力量，维护腐朽的制度，做好剥削工人心血的准备。而事实上，你没有力量，什么也做不了；你就像一艘失事的航船在商业的海滩搁浅了，你被迫与一些很现实的人发生冲突，这些人你对付不了，因为你永远成为不了一名商人。”
The first part of Hunsden's speech moved me not at all, or, if it did, it was only to wonder at the perversion into which prejudice, had twisted his judgment of my character. The concluding sentence, however, not only moved but shook me; the blow it gave was a severe one, because Truth wielded the weapon. If I smiled now, it was only in disdain of myself.
亨斯登先生讲话的前一部分对我没有任何触动，即使有的话，那也只是对他的误解有些惊讶，他的偏见扭曲了他对我性格的判断。然而，最后一句话不止触动了我，更使我感到震撼；这句话给我沉重的打击，因为真理就是武器。如果我现在一笑了之，那就只是我自己对自己的藐视。
Hunsden saw his advantage. He followed it up.
亨斯登先生看到他占了上风。他趁热打铁。
'You'll make nothing by trade, ' continued he- 'nothing more than the crust of dry bread and the draught of fair water on which you now live; your only chance of getting a competency lies in marrying a rich widow or running away with an heiress. '
“靠经商你得不到什么，” 他继续说道， “仅仅是维持生计的干面包皮和少得可怜的清水。你唯一的出头机会是娶一位富有的寡妇或是和一位女继承人私奔。”
'I leave such shifts to be put in practice by those who devise them, ' said I, rising.
“我把这些选择留给出点子的人去实践。” 我起身说道。
'And even that is hopeless, ' he went on coolly. 'What widow would have you? Much less, what heiress? You're not bold and venturesome enough for the one, nor handsome and fascinating enough for the other. You think perhaps you look intelligent and polished. Carry your intellect and refinement to market, and tell me in a private note what price is bid for them. '
“甚至这种机会也是很渺茫。” 他继续冷冷地说。 “什么样的寡妇要你？更不用说哪个女继承人了。就寡妇来说，你不够大胆，也没有冒险精神，再说你也不够英俊迷人，能吸引到什么女继承人。你可能觉得你看起来很机智、高雅。把你的聪明才智和高雅拿到市场，悄悄写信告诉我它们能值几个钱吧。”
Mr. Hunsden had taken his tone for the night; the string he struck was out of tune; he would finger no other. Averse to discord, of which I had enough every day and all day long, I concluded, at last, that silence and solitude were preferable to jarring converse; I bade him good-night.
亨斯登先生的语调里已有了倦意，说话语无伦次，也不想扯其它的了。我不喜欢争吵不休，这些我平日里一天到晚已经受够了，最终我总结出，沉默孤独要比刺耳的争吵声好得多；于是我向他道了晚安。
'What! Are you going, lad? Well, good-night. You'll find the door. ' And he sat still in front of the fire, while I left the room and the house. I had got a good way on my return to my lodgings before I found out that I was walking very fast, and breathing very hard, and that my nails were almost stuck into the palms of my clenched hands, and that my teeth were set fast. On making this discovery I relaxed both my pace, fists, and jaws, but I could not so soon cause the regrets rushing rapidly through my mind to slacken their tide. Why did I make myself a tradesman? Why did I enter Hunsden's house this evening? Why, at dawn to-morrow, must I repair to Crimsworth's mill? All that night did I ask myself these questions, and all that night fiercely demanded of my soul an answer. I got no sleep; my head burned, my feet froze. At last the factory bells rang, and I sprang from my bed with other slaves.
“什么！你要走了，小伙子？好吧，晚安。你可以找到出去的门。” 我走出房间，离开他家的时候，他坐在火炉前一动也不动。在回住所的途中，走了好一段路，我才发现自己步子很快，呼吸急促，指甲都快陷进紧握的手掌里了，牙也咬得紧紧的。在我意识到这些时，我即刻放慢了脚步，松开了拳头，放松了牙齿，但是我不能很快安抚迅速涌上心头的悔意。为什么我要做一名商人？我今晚为什么去亨斯登先生的家？为什么明天早上我又得去克利姆斯沃思的工厂？一整个晚上我都在问自己这些问题，一整个晚上我都强烈要求自己的内心给自己一个答复。我辗转难眠。我脑袋烧起来了，脚冻得冰凉。终于工厂的铃声响了，我和其他奴隶一样，从床上一跃而起。