Chapter I

My Family

I have been asked by my American friends to write the story of my life. At first,the idea seemed alien to me, but I yielded to persuasion. However,I could not conceive my biography as a complete expression of personal feelings or a detailed description of all incidents I would remember. Many of our feelings change with the years, and,when faded away, may seem altogether strange; incidents lose their momentary interest and may be remembered as if they have occurred to some other person. But there may be in a life some general direction, some continuous thread, due to a few dominant ideas and a few strong feelings, that explain the life and are characteristic of a human personality. Of my life, which has not been easy on the whole, I have described the general course and the essential features, and I trust that my story gives an understanding of the state of mind in which I have lived and worked.

My family is of Polish origin, and my name is Marie Sklodowska. My father and my mother both came from among the small Polish landed proprietors. In my country this class is composed of a large number of families, owners of small and medium-sized estates, frequently interrelated. It has been, until recently, chiefly from this group that Poland has drawn her intellectual recruits.

While my paternal grandfather had divided his time between agriculture and directing a provincial college, my father, more strongly drawn to study, followed the course of the University of Petrograd, and later definitely established himself at Warsaw as Professor of Physics and Mathematics in one of the lyceums of that city. He married a young woman whose mode of life was congenial to his; for, although very young, she had, what was, for that time, a very serious education, and was the, director of one of the best Warsaw schools for young girls.

My father and mother worshiped their profession in the highest degree and have left, all over their country, a lasting remembrance with their pupils. I cannot, even today, go into Polish society without meeting persons who have tender memories of my parents.

Although my parents adopted a university career, they continued to keep in close touch with their numerous family in the country. It was with their relatives that I frequently spent my vacation, living in all freedom and finding opportunities to know the field life by which I was deeply attracted. To these conditions, so different from the usual villegiature, I believe, I owe my love for the country and nature.

Born at Warsaw, on the 7th of November, 1867, I was the last of five children, but my oldest sister died at the early age of fourteen, and we were left, three sisters and a brother. Cruelly struck by the loss of her daughter and worn away by a grave illness, my mother died at forty-two, leaving her husband in the deepest sorrow with his children. I was then only nine years old, and my eldest brother was hardly thirteen.

This catastrophe was the first great sorrow of my life and threw me into a profound depression. My mother had an exceptional personality. With all her intellectuality she had a big heart and a very high sense of duty. And, though possessing infinite indulgence and good nature, she still held in the family a remarkable moral authority. She had an ardent piety (my parents were both Catholics), but she was never intolerant; differences in religious belief did not trouble her; she was equally kind to any one not sharing her opinions. Her influence over me was extraordinary, for in me the natural love of the little girl for her mother was united with a passionate admiration.

Very much affected by the death of my mother, my father devoted himself entirely to his work and to the care of our education. His professional obligations were heavy and left him little leisure time. For many years we all felt weighing on us the loss of the one who had been the soul of the house.

We all started our studies very young. I was only six years old, and, because I was the youngest and smallest in the class, was frequently brought forward to recite when there were visitors. This was a great trial to me, because of my timidity; I wanted always to run away and hide. My father, an excellent educator, was interested in our work and knew how to direct it, but the conditions of our education were difficult. We began our studies in private schools and finished them in those of the government

Warsaw was then under Russian domination, and one of the worst aspects of this control was the oppression exerted on the school and the child. The private schools directed by Poles were closely watched by the police and overburdened with the necessity of teaching the Russian language even to children so young that they could scarcely speak their native Polish. Nevertheless, since the teachers were nearly all of Polish nationality, they endeavored in every possible way to mitigate the difficulties resulting from the national persecution. These schools, however, could not legally give diplomas, which were obtainable only in those of the government.

The latter, entirely Russian, were directly opposed to the Polish national spirit. All instruction was given in Russian, by Russian professors, who, being hostile to the Polish nation, treated their pupils as enemies. Men of moral and intellectual distinction could scarcely agree to teach in schools where an alien attitude was forced upon them. So what the pupils were taught was of questionable value, and the moral atmosphere was altogether unbearable. Constantly held in suspicion and spied upon, the children knew that a single conversation in Polish, or an imprudent word, might seriously harm, not only themselves, but also their families. Amidst these hostilities, they lost all the joy of life, and precocious feelings of distrust and indignation weighed upon their childhood. On the other side, this abnormal situation resulted in exciting the patriotic feeling of Polish youths to the highest degree.

Yet of this period of my early youth, darkened though it was by mourning and the sorrow of oppression, I still keep more than one pleasant remembrance. In our quiet but occupied life, reunions of relatives and friends of our family brought some joy. My father was very interested in literature and well acquainted with Polish and foreign poetry; he even composed poetry himself and was able to translate it from foreign languages into Polish in a very successful way. His little poems on family events were our delight. On Saturday evenings he used to recite or read to us the masterpieces of Polish prose and poetry. These evenings were for us a great pleasure and a source of renewed patriotic feelings.

Since my childhood I have had a strong taste for poetry, and I willingly learned by heart long passages from our great poets, the favorite ones being Mickiewecz, Krasinski and Slowacki. This taste was even more developed when I became acquainted with foreign literatures; my early studies included the knowledge of French, German, and Russian, and I soon became familiar with the fine works written in these languages. Later I felt the need of knowing English and succeeded in acquiring the knowledge of that language and its literature.

My musical studies have been very scarce. My mother was a musician and had a beautiful voice. She wanted us to have musical training. After her death, having no more encouragement from her, I soon abandoned this effort, which I often regretted afterwards.

I learned easily mathematics and physics, as far as these sciences were taken in consideration in the school. I found in this ready help from my father, who loved science and had to teach it himself. He enjoyed any explanation he could give us about Nature and her ways. Unhappily, he had no laboratory and could not perform experiments.

The periods of vacations were particularly comforting, when, escaping the strict watch of the police in the city, we took refuge with relatives or friends in the country. There we found the free life of the old-fashioned family estate; races in the woods and joyous participation in work in the far-stretching, level grain-fields. At other times we passed the border of our Russian-ruled division and went southwards into the mountain country of Galicia, where the Austrian political control was less oppressive than that which we suffered. There we could speak Polish in all freedom and sing patriotic songs without going to prison.

My first impression of the mountains was very vivid, because I ad been brought up in the plains. So I enjoyed immensely our life in the Carpathian villages, the view of the pikes, the excursions to the valleys and to the high mountain lakes with picturesque names such as: "The Eye of the Sea. "However, I never lost my attachment to the open horizon and the gentle views of a plain hill country.

Later I had the opportunity to spend a vacation with my father far more south in Podolia, and to have the first view of the sea at Odessa, and afterwards at the Baltic shore. This was a thrilling experience. But it was in France that I become acquainted with the big waves of the ocean and the ever-changing tide. All my life through, the new sights of Nature made me rejoice like a child.

Thus passed the period of our school life. We all had much facility for intellectual work. My brother, Doctor Sklodowski, having finished his medical studies, became later the chief physician in one of the principal Warsaw hospitals. My sisters and I intended to take up teaching as our parents had done. However, my elder sister, when grown up, changed her mind and decided to study medicine. She took the degree of doctor at the Paris University, married Doctor Dluski, a Polish physician, and together they established an important sanatorium in a wonderfully beautiful Carpathian mountain place of Austrian Poland. My second sister, married in Warsaw, Mrs. Szalay, was for many years a teacher in the schools, where she rendered great service. Later she was appointed in one of the lyceums of free Poland.

I was but fifteen when I finished my high-school studies, always havin held first rank in my class. The fatigue of growth and study compelled me to take almost a year's rest in the country. I then returned to my father in Warsaw, hoping to teach in the free schools. But family circumstances obliged me to change my decision. My father, now aged and tired, needed rest; his fortune was very modest. So I resolved to accept a position as governess for several children. Thus, when scarcely seventeen, I left my father's house to begin an independent life.

That going away remains one of the most vivid memories of my youth. My heart was heavy as I climbed into the railway car. It was to carry me for several hours, away from those I loved. And after the railway journey I must drive for five hours longer. What experience was awaiting me? So I questioned as I sat close to the car window looking out across the wide plains.

The father of the family to which I went was an agriculturist. His oldest daughter was about my age, and although working with me, was my companion rather than my pupil. There were two younger children, a boy and a girl. My relations with my pupils were friendly; after our lessons we went together for daily walks. Loving the country, I did not feel lonesome, and although this particular country was not especially picturesque, I was satisfied with it in all seasons. I took the greatest interest in the agricultural development of the estate where the methods were considered as models for the region. I knew the progressive details of the work, the distribution of crops in the fields; I eagerly followed the growth of the plants, and in the stables of the farm I knew the horses.

In winter the vast plains, covered with snow, were not lacking in charm, and we went for long sleigh rides. Sometimes we could hardly see the road. "Look out for the ditch! "I would call to the driver. "You are going straight into it, "and "Never fear! " he would answer, as over we went! But these tumbles only added to the gayety of our excursions.

I remember the marvelous snow house we made one winter when the snow was very high in the fields; we could sit in it and look out across the rose-tinted snow plains. We also used to skate on the ice of the river and to watch the weather anxiously, to make sure that the ice was not going to give way, depriving us of our pleasure.

Since my duties with my pupils did not take up all my time, I organized a small class for the children of the village who could not be educated under the Russian government. In this the oldest daughter of the house aided me. We taught the little children and the girls who wished to come how to read and write, and we put in circulation Polish books which were appreciated, too, by the parents. Even this innocent work presented danger, as all initiative of this kind was forbidden by the government and might bring imprisonment or deportation to Siberia.

My evenings I generally devoted to study. I had heard that a few women had succeeded in following certain courses in Petrograd or in foreign countries, and I was determined to prepare myself by preliminary work to follow their example.

I had not yet decided what path I would choose. I was as much interested in literature and sociology as in science. However, during three years of isolated work, trying little by little to find my real preferences, I finally turned towards mathematics and physics, and resolutely undertook a serious preparation for future work. This work I proposed doing in Paris, and I hoped to save enough money to be able to live and work in that city for some time.

My solitary study was beset with difficulties. The scientific education I had received at the lyceum was very incomplete; it was well under the bachelorship program of a French lyceum; I tried to add to it in my own way, with the help of books picked up at random. This method could not be greatly productive, yet it was not without results. I acquired the habit of independent work, and learned a few things which were to be of use later on.

I had to modify my plans for the future when my eldest sister decided to go to Paris to study medicine. We had promised each other mutual aid, but our means did not permit of our leaving together. So I kept my position for three and a half years, and, having finished my work with my pupils, I returned to Warsaw, where a position, similar to the one I had left, was awaiting me.

I kept this new place for only a year and then went back to my father, who had retired some time before and was living alone. Together we passed an excellent year, he occupying himself with some literary work, while I increased our funds by giving private lessons. Meantime I continued my efforts to educate myself. This was no easy task under the Russian government of Warsaw; yet I found more opportunities than in the country. To my great joy, I was able, for the first time in my life, to find access to a laboratory: a small municipal physical laboratory directed by one of my cousins. I found little time to work there, except in the evenings and on Sundays, and was generally left to myself. I tried out various experiments described in treatises on physics and chemistry, and the results were sometimes unexpected. At times I would be encouraged by a little unhopedfor success, at others I would be in the deepest despair because of accidents and failures resulting from my inexperience. But on the whole, though I was taught that the way of progress is neither swift nor easy, this first trial confirmed in me the taste for experimental research in the fields of physic and chemistry.

Other means of instruction came to me through my being one of an enthusiastic group of young men and women of Warsaw, who united in a common desire to study, and whose activities were at the same time social and patriotic. It was one of those groups of Polish youths who believed that the hope of their country lay in a great effort to develop the intellectual and moral strength of the nation, and that such an effort would lead to a better national situation. The nearest purpose was to work at one's own instruction and to provide means of instruction for workmen and peasants. In accordance with this program we agreed among ourselves to give evening courses, each one teaching what he knew best. There is no need to say that this was a secret organization, which made everything extremely difficult. There were in our group very devoted young people who, as I still believe today, could do truly useful work.

I have a bright remembrance of the sympathetic intellectual and social companionship which I enjoyed at that time. Truly the means of action were poor and the results obtained could not be considerable; yet I still believe that the ideas which inspired us then are the only way to real social progress. You cannot hope to build a better world without improving the individuals. To that end each of us must work for his own improvement, and at the same time share a general responsibility for all humanity, our particular duty being to aid those to whom we think we can be most useful.

All the experiences of this period intensified my longing for further study. And, in his affection for me, my father, in spite of limited resources, helped me to hasten the execution of my early project. My sister had just married at Paris, and it was decided that I should go there to live with her. My father and I hoped that, once my studies were finished, we would again live happily together. Fate was to decide otherwise, since my marriage was to hold me in France. My father, who in his own youth had wished to do scientific work, was consoled in our separation by the progressive success of my work. I keep a tender memory of his kindness and disinterestedness. He lived with the family of my married brother, and, like an excellent grandfather, brought up the children. We had the sorrow of losing him in 1902, when he had just passed seventy.

So it was in November, 1891, at the age of twenty-four, that I was able to realize the dream that had been always present in my mind for several years.

When I arrived in Paris I was affectionately welcomed by my sister and brother-in-law, but I stayed with them only for a few months, for they lived in one of the outside quarters of Paris where my brother-in-law was beginning a medical practice, and I needed to get nearer to the schools. I was finally installed, like many other students of my country, in a modest little room for which I gathered some furniture. I kept to this way of living during the four years of my student life.

It would be impossible to tell of all the good these years brought to me. Undistracted by any outside occupation, I was entirely absorbed in the joy of learning and understanding. Yet, all the while, my living conditions were far from easy, my own funds being small and my family not having the means to aid me as they would have liked to do. However, my situation was not exceptional; it was the familiar experience of many of the Polish students whom I knew. The room I lived in was in a garret, very cold in winter, for it was insufficiently heated by a small stove which often lacked coal. During a particularly rigorous winter, it was not unusual for the water to freeze in the basin in the night; to be able to sleep I was obliged to pile all my clothes on the blankets. In the same room I prepared my meals with the aid of an alcohol lamp and a few kitchen utensils. These meals were often reduced to bread with a cup of chocolate, eggs or fruit. I had no help in housekeeping and I myself carried the little coal I used up the six flights

This life, painful from certain points of view, had, for all that, a real charm for me. It gave me a very precious sense of liberty and independence. Unknown in Paris, I was lost in the great city, but the feeling of living there alone, taking care of myself without any aid, did not at all depress me. If sometimes I felt lonesome, my usual state of mind was one of calm and great moral satisfaction.

All my mind was centered on my studies, which, especially at the beginning, were difficult. In fact, I was insufficiently prepared to follow th physical science course at the Sorbonne, for, despite all my efforts, I had not succeeded in acquiring in Poland a preparation as complete as that of the French students following the same course. So I was obliged to supply this deficiency, especially in mathematics. I divided my time between courses, experimental work, and study in the library. In the evening I worked in my room, sometimes very late into the night. All that I saw and learned that was new delighted me. It was like a new world opened to me, the world of science, which I was at last permitted to know in all liberty.

I have pleasant memories of my relations with my student companions. Reserved and shy at the beginning, it was not long before I noticed that the students, nearly all of whom worked seriously, were disposed to be friendly. Our conversations about our studies deepened our interest in the problems we discussed.

Among the Polish students I did not have any companions in my studies. Nevertheless, my relations with their small colony had a certain intimacy. From time to time we would gather in one another's bare rooms, where we could talk over national questions and feel less isolated. We would also go for walks together, or attend public reunions, for we were all interested in politics. By the end of the first year, however, I was forced to give up these relationships, for I found that all my energy had to be concentrated on my studies, in order to achieve them as soon as possible. I was even obliged to devote most of my vacation time to mathematics.

My persistent efforts were not in vain. I was able to make up for the deficiency of my training and to pass examinations at the same time with the other students. I even had the satisfaction of graduating in first rank as"licenci é e es sciences physiques" in 1893, and in second rank as "licenci é e es sciences math é matiques" in 1894.

My brother-in-law, recalling later these years of work under the conditions I have just described, jokingly referred to them as "the heroic period of my sister-in-law's life." For myself, I shall always consider one of the best memories of my life that period of solitary years exclusively devoted to the studies, finally within my reach, for which I had waited so long.

It was in 1894 that I first met Pierre Curie. One of my compatriots, a professor at the University of Fribourg, having called upon me, invited me to his home, with a young physicist of Paris, whom he knew and esteemed highly. Upon entering the room I perceived, standing framed by the French window opening on the balcony, a tall young man with auburn hair and large, limpid eyes. I noticed the grave and gentle expression of his face, as well as a certain abandon in his attitude, suggesting the dreamer absorbed in his reflections. He showed me a simple cordiality and seemed to me very sympathetic. After that first interview he expressed the desire to see me again and to continue our conversation of that evening on scientific and social subjects in which he and I were both interested, and on which we seemed to have similar opinions.

Some time later, he came to me in my student room and we became good friends. He described to me his days, filled with work, and his dream of an existence entirely devoted to science. He was not long in asking me to share that existence, but I could not decide at once; I hesitated before a decision that meant abandoning my country and my family.

I went back to Poland for my vacation, without knowing whether or not I was to return to Paris. But circumstances permitted me again to take up my work there in the autumn of that year. I entered one of the physics laboratories at the Sorbonne, to begin experimental research in preparation for my doctor's thesis.

Again I saw Pierre Curie. Our work drew us closer and closer, until we were both convinced that neither of us could find a better life companion. So our marriage was decided upon and took place a little later, in July, 1895.

Pierre Curie had just received his doctor's degree and had been made professor in the School of Physics and Chemistry of the City of Paris. He was thirty-six years old, and already a physicist known and appreciated in France and abroad. Solely preoccupied with scientific investigation, he had paid little attention to his career, and his material resources were very modest. He lived at Sceaux, in the suburbs of Paris, with his old parents, whom he loved tenderly, and whom he described as "exquisite" the first time he spoke to me about them. In fact, they were so: the father was an elderly physician of high intellect and strong character, and the mother the most excellent of women, entirely devoted to her husband and her sons. Pierre's elder brother, who was then professor at the University of Montpellier, was always his best friend. So I had the privilege of entering into a family worthy of affection and esteem, and where I found the warmest welcome.

We were married in the simplest way. I wore no unusual dress on my marriage day, and only a few friends were present at the ceremony, but I had the joy of having my father and my second sister come from Poland.

We did not care for more than a quiet place in which to live and to work, and were happy to find a little apartment of three rooms with a beautiful view of a garden. A few pieces of furniture came to us from our parents. With a money gift from a relative we acquired two bicycles to take us out into the country. LjhWa4bS0b+O+yaVkyWPgUy4LfwDgxWyHA1z3xanSAuBK3utT2FStkeYovG9RGLz