Maintain Your Unique Individuality Diligently
Having Hearts in Eyes
Cody started life weighing 24 ounces.
Due to extreme premature, our son had eye surgery to prevent blindness. As a result of the surgery, he lost peripheral vision in his right eye. And his near sightedness would mean glasses and close monitoring by an ophthalmologist for the rest of his life.
Such a small price to pay, in our opinion, compared to the alternative.
Cody wore glasses with great pride, making it abundantly clear to his little brothers that Mommy and Daddy also wore glasses, and wasn’ t it a shame that they didn’ t have any themselves. This usually prompted a round of begging from his siblings that it was only fair they get glasses, too.
Then kindergarten happened.
One day, a couple of kids at recess derailed Cody’ s bright outlook on having glasses in his possession. One boy said, your glasses look stupid, Cody. Another kid yanked them off his face and bent them.
Cody was a timid, small child. Seeing tears well up in his eyes, as he recounted the event, wrung our hearts dry.
Just recently though, something changed his outlook.
It was the morning of Valentine’ s Day. I shut off the alarm and groped around in the dark until I found my glasses. I donned them and without turning on the light, blindly made my way to the bathroom. I flipped the bathroom switch, and there I discovered why it was extra dark in my bedroom.
My husband, Stephen, had placed two red heart stickers on my glasses. And plastered all over the mismatched antique mirrors above our bathroom basins were the same stickers.
“VALENTINE,” my husband had scrawled on one mirror, “I LOVE YOU THIS MUCH!”
In one mirror was drawn a stick arm with a hand pointing west. And in the other mirror was the same thing pointing east. I was chuckling under my breath, so as not to wake the rest of the household, while staring at my reflection.
I penned my response in the mirror, “Thanks to you, sweetie. I’ ve got hearts in my eyes!”
While dressing Cody for school, he whispered, “Mom?”
“Yes, big boy?” I whispered back.
“You got hearts on your glasses.”
“Yep, I sure do.”
“You’ re funny, Mom,” he said, his eyes sparkling. We both climbed into the cab of the pickup truck, where other hearts ambushed us. Stuck to the steering wheel was a heart. Another one was on the rearview mirror, on my truck key, on the stick shift, and on my wallet. All compliments of my heart happy husband.
I peeled the hearts from my glasses and handed them to Cody. He stuck them carefully on his own glasses and smiled the whole way to school.
I parked in front of his school.
“Get your book bag, sweetie,” I said.
“Mom, can I wear my hearts to class?”
I debated it for a moment. Pulling a “stunt” like this could go either way. But the pleading in his eyes sealed it for me. How could I deny him what may turn out to be a fun opportunity?
“I don’ t see why not, big boy.”
I placed two hearts on my own glasses, and together we entered his school, hand in hand, parting the crowd in the hallway on our way to his classroom.
“Ha! Look at Cody Oliver! He’ s got hearts on his glasses!” one observer called out.
“Oh, look at Cody! How cute!” shouted another, pointing and giggling.
Cody smiled shyly, gripping my hand for dear life.
When we arrived at the doorway, classmates gathered around my little guy, while I saw him trying to shake off the biggest grin I’ d ever seen on his face.
“That’ s neat! Hearts on your glasses!”
“Cody, can I try them on?”
One little girl tugged at my sleeve. “Mrs. Oliver?”
“Yes?”
“I wish I had glasses.”
I knew then without a doubt that Cody’ s outlook was back on track.
Just by having hearts in his eyes.
眼里有心
科迪出生时仅仅24盎司。
因为是极度早产,我们的儿子做了眼部手术以防止失明。手术结果是,他失去了右眼的周边视觉。右眼近视就意味着他终身都需要戴眼镜,终身都需要有眼科专家的密切监察。
相对于失明,我们认为这点代价实在是微不足道。
科迪极为骄傲地戴上了眼镜,那种骄傲劲让他的弟弟们一眼就能看出:爸爸、妈妈都戴眼镜,而他们却不戴,简直有点不像话。于是弟弟们时常轮番恳求也要戴眼镜,否则不公平嘛。
转眼该上幼儿园了。
有一天课间休息时,两个小男孩彻底摧毁了科迪对戴眼镜所抱有的自豪感。一个男孩说,科迪,你的眼镜看上去好蠢。而另一个竟猛地把科迪的眼镜摘下,把它弄弯。
科迪个头小,生性腼腆。他回家跟我们说起这件事时,眼泪直在眼睛里打转,我们的心里好难受。
但就在最近,有件事改变了他对眼镜的看法。
那是情人节的早晨。闹钟一响,我赶紧按住,然后在黑暗中摸索着找到我的眼镜。我戴上眼镜,没有开灯,摸黑走进卫生间。轻轻按下卫生间的电灯开关,我才明白过来为什么卧室是那样出奇地黑暗。
我先生斯蒂芬在我的眼镜片上分别贴了两个红色心形贴画。而在我们卫生间盥洗池上方那些大小不一的古董镜子上也都贴满了红心。
“我的爱,我这么地爱你!” 我先生在一面镜子上潦草地写道。
在一面镜子上画有一只伸直的胳膊,手指向西边。而另一面镜子上也画有一只伸直的胳膊,手指向东边。瞅着镜中的自己,我使劲忍住不笑出声来,怕弄醒丈夫和孩子。
我也在镜子上写下了我的回复: “谢谢你,亲爱的。我的眼里满是心!”
在给科迪穿衣服准备去学校时,他低声说: “妈妈?”
“嗯,我的大男孩?” 我低声应和。
“你眼镜上有红心。”
“没错,有啊。”
“你真有意思,妈妈。” 他说了句,眼里放着光芒。我们俩钻进小货车的驾驶室里,又有好多心将我们包围。方向盘上贴有红心,后视镜上有一个,钥匙上有一个,换挡杆上有一个,我的皮夹上还有一个。我那不知忧愁为何物的老公真是大献殷勤。
我把那两颗心从我的眼镜上揭下,递给科迪。他小心翼翼地把它们贴到自己的眼镜片上,去学校的一路上他都是笑眯眯的。
我在校门口停下来。
“拿上你的书包,宝贝。” 我说。
“妈妈,我能戴着红心上学吗?”
我心里斗争了一会儿。如此当众 “表演” 可能一鸣惊人,也可能一败涂地。但是科迪眼里流露出的恳求让我不再犹豫。我怎能剥夺有可能让他开心的一个大好机会呢?
“我看没有什么不可以的,小伙子。”
我又把两个红心贴在我自己的镜片上,然后我们一起走进学校,手拉着手,穿过走廊中的人群,朝他的教室走去。
“哈!快看科迪·奥利弗。他的眼镜上有红心!” 一个人看见了,嚷了起来。
“啊,看科迪!多酷呀!” 另一个发现者也嚷着,指着我们咯咯地笑。
科迪腼腆地微笑着,紧紧地抓住我的手。
当我们来到教室门口时,同学们围住科迪,而我看到他在努力克制他的笑容,那是我在他脸上看见过的最开心的笑容。
“真有意思!眼镜上有心!”
“科迪,让我戴一下好吗?”
一个小姑娘扯了扯我的衣袖。 “您是奥利弗太太?”
“是啊。你有什么事?”
“我要是戴眼镜就好了。”
就在那时,我一点也不再怀疑,科迪又重新拾回了他的自信。
很简单,就是让眼里有心。
Vocabulary
premature adj. &n. 早产的,早产儿
To realize the value of one month, ask a mother who has given birth to a premature. 想知道一个月的价值,去问问一个早产孩子的母亲。
peripheral adj. 外围的
Although your peripheral vision might be wide, only a small part of that vista is in sharp focus. 尽管你的外围视觉很宽,但只有一小部分场景在清晰的焦点上面。
ophthalmologist n. 眼科医师
India has only about one ophthalmologist for every 120 000 people. 印度平均每12万人才拥有一名眼科医生。
abundantly adv. 丰富地;大量地
To live abundantly means simply to increase the range and intensity of our relations. 所谓活得丰富多彩不过是增大我们与外界联系的范围和强度。
timid adj. 胆小的;羞怯的
Timid people always wreak their peevishness on the gentle. 怯懦的人总是把满腹牢骚向温和的人发泄。
sticker n. 张贴物,贴纸
It was a yellow cab with a black sticker on the body. 那辆黄色出租车上面贴有黑色贴纸。
whisper n. 飒飒的声音,耳语
His voice fell to a whisper. 他的声音降低成为耳语。
compliment n. 恭维,称赞
What a nice compliment! 多么好的赞美啊!
pleading n. 恳求
This is a special pleading, without a doubt. 无疑的,这是特殊的请求。
grin n. 露齿笑
A mischievous grin was among the child’ s many charms. 顽皮露齿而笑是这个孩子可爱的特征之一。
牛津的成功启迪课
这个世界上的每一个人,都没有理由自暴自弃。请尊重自己的个性,不管它是不是足够 “好” ,因为正是它们让你成为你自己。在爱你的人眼里,无论你是怎样的,都是他们珍爱至极的,因为他们眼里有心。如果你的眼里也有心,就会像科迪一样拥有自信——有爱环绕在身边,还有什么道理不爱自己,不相信自己呢?
Think More About What You Have
One of the more pervasive and destructive mental tendencies I’ ve seen is that of focusing on what we want instead of what we have. It doesn’ t seem to make my difference how much we have, we just keep expanding our list of desires, which guarantees we will remain dissatisfied. The mind—set that says “I’ ll be happy when this desire is fulfilled” is the same mind—set that will repeat itself once that desire is met.
We want this or that. If we don’ t get what we want, we keep thinking about all that we don’ t have and we remain dissatisfied. If we do get what we want, we simply recreate the same thinking in our new circumstances. So, despite getting what we want, we still remain unhappy. Happiness can’ t be found when we are yearning for new desires.
Luckily, there is a way to be happy. It involves changing the emphasis of our thinking from what we want to what we have. Rather than wishing your spouse was different, try thinking about her wonderful qualities. Instead of complaining about your salary, be grateful that you have a job. Rather than wishing you were able to take a vacation to Hawaii, think of how much fun you have had close to home. The list of possibilities is endless! Each time you notice yourself falling into the “I wish life were different” trap, back off and start over. Take a breath and remember all that you have to be grateful. When you focus not on what you want, but on what you have, you end up getting more of what you want anyway. If you focus on the good qualities of your spouse, she’ ll be more loving. If you are grateful for your job rather than complaining about it, you’ ll do a better job, be more productive, and probably end up getting a raise anyway. If you focus on ways to enjoy yourself around home rather than waiting to enjoy yourself in Hawaii, you’ ll end up having more fun. If you ever do get to Hawaii, you’ ll be in the habit of enjoying yourself. And, if by some chance you don’ t, you have a great life anyway.
Make a note of yourself to start thinking more about what you have than what you want. If you do, your life will start appearing much better than before. For perhaps the first time in your life, you’ ll know what it means to feel satisfied.
多想想你拥有的
专注于我们想得到的,而不是我们所拥有的,这是我见过的一种最具普遍性和破坏性的心理趋向。我们拥有多少,似乎并无太大区别,我们欲望的清单不断扩充,使我们永远不满足。 “当我实现了这个愿望,就会快乐。” 一旦这个欲望得到满足,以后还会出现相同的欲求心理。
我们想要这个或那个。如果得不到,就会不断地去想那些没有的东西,总是感到不满足。而如果得到了,在新的条件下,我们又产生同样的心理。所以,尽管我们得到了,还是不开心。如果我们一味地渴求新的欲望,将无法找到幸福。
幸运的是,我们想要获得幸福,有这样一种方法:转换我们思考的重心,从想要的转移到拥有的。我们可以试着去想伴侣的可贵品质,而不去希求她该如何与现在不同;可以为自己拥有一份工作充满感激,而不去抱怨薪水太低;可以设想闭门在家的种种乐趣,而不是渴望去夏威夷度假。可以这样去考虑的事物无穷无尽!一旦你意识到自己又陷入这个思维陷阱—— “我希望生活不是这样” 时,要退后一步,重新思考。深呼吸,想想你所拥有的。这样,感激之情便会油然而生。
当你关注的不再是自己想要的,而是所拥有的时,你最终得到的一定会比想要的更多:如果你关注伴侣的优秀品德,她就会更可爱;如果你对工作充满感激,而不是抱怨,你会做得更好,工作效率会更高,薪水也可能提高;如果你在家能自得其乐,而不是等着去夏威夷享受,你会找到更多的乐趣。假设你真的去了夏威夷,往往会更快乐;即使因为某种偶然原因没能去成,仍然会过得开心。
记住,从现在开始,多想想你拥有的,而不是你想要的。如果你这样做,你的生活就会比以前更美好。或许这将是你生命中第一次懂得心满意足的含义。
Vocabulary
pervasive adj. 普遍的,无处不在的
Law is a pervasive feature of social life that profoundly affects us. 法在社会生活中无处不在,深刻地影响着我们。
destructive adj. 破坏性的
It is the most destructive storm in 20 years. 这是20年来破坏性最大的一次风暴。
guarantee vt. &n. 担保,保证
People are willing to lend to these organizations at low interest rates because they think there’ s an implicit government guarantee. 人们愿意以低利率,向这些组织提供融资,因为他们认为这里有政府默认的担保。
yearn vi. 渴望,向往
Young men yearn to succeed. 年轻人渴望成功。
emphasis n. 重点;强调
So my entire emphasis is upon perception. It’ s my perception, which from my point of way, which may not be yours. 所以我所有的重点都在观念上。那是我的观念,从我的角度出发的,那不能成为你们的观念。
note n. &vt. 评注,注释;记录,注意
Please note my words. 请注意我的话。
牛津的成功启迪课
在纷杂的世界中,我们要学着知足常乐。人的欲望是无止境的,我们要多看看自己所拥有的,而不是我们想要的。如果能做到这样,那我们最终所得到的一定会比想要的更多。
Care Your Dream
My dream ended when I was born, although I never knew it then. I just held on to something that would never come to pass. Dreams really do exist. But in the morning when you wake up, they are remembered just as a dream. That is what happened to me.
I always have the dream to dance like a beautiful ballerina twirling around and around and hearing people applaud for me. When I was young, I would twirling around and around in the fields of wildflowers that grew in my backyard. For hours I would dance as if people were watching me. I would dance so fast that I would forget where I was, until I would hear sounds that reminded me of where I really was. I thought that if I twirled faster everything would disappear and I would wake up in a new place. Reality woke me up when I heard a voice saying, “I don’ t know why you bother trying to dance. Ballerinas are pretty, slender little girls. Besides, you don’ t have the talent to even be a ballerina.” I remember how those words paralyzed every feeling in my body. I fell to the ground and wept for hours.
We lived in the country by a nearby lake and I would sometimes go there to hide. My parents were never home anyway and I did not like to be at home where I could hear the walls talking of pain. When they were home, my mother just yelled and criticized because nothing was ever perfect in her life. She dreamed of a different life but ended up living in a country far away from the city where she believed her dreams would have come true.
I enjoyed hanging out by the water. I would sit there for hours and stare at my reflection. There I was, looked nothing like a pretty ballerina dancer. Reflections don’ t lie. Once the waves would come, my reflection was gone. Washed away just like my dream to dance. I sat there staring at the water, hoping that my reflection would reappear and be different.
As I grew older, I began to realize that the reason my dream was even born in the first place, was because it was something that was inside of me. The dream I had was never nurtured and cared for, so it slowly died. It’ s not that I wanted it to die, but I allowed it to die the day I started listening to the words, “You can’ t do it.” When I finally woke up from many years of dreaming, I realized that you can’ t settle for dancing in the wildflowers, you have to move on to the platform. I still go to the lake sometimes and sit there. Looking at my reflection is different now too. When I was young, I looked at how others saw me, now that I am older and wiser, I look at how God sees me.
呵护你的梦想
我一出生,梦想就结束了,然而当时我却毫不知晓,仍执着于一些永无实现之日的事情。我的确怀有许多梦想。不过,当早晨醒来之时,所记起的却只是一场梦境而已。我的经历就是如此。
我一直梦想着像一个美丽的芭蕾演员一样跳舞,轻盈地旋来转去,耳边是人们的掌声喝彩。小时候,我常常在自家后院长满野花的草地上练习芭蕾舞的旋转动作。我会一连跳上几个小时,就像有人在观赏一样。我跳得那么快速,以至于忘了自己身在何处,直到某种声音把我拉回到现实中。
我想要是我转得再快一点,眼前的一切都会消失,我将会获得一方新的天地。然而现实唤醒了我,我听到一个声音说: “我不明白你为什么不厌其烦地尝试跳舞。跳芭蕾舞的人都长得漂亮、苗条,娇小可爱。还有,你也没有跳芭蕾舞的天分。” 记得当时那些话让我的全身都失去了知觉。我瘫倒在地上,哭了好几个小时。
我们家住在乡下,附近有一个湖,我时常去湖边寻求逃避。我的父母经常不在家,我也不喜欢待在家里。在家里,只能听到墙壁发出的痛苦的声音。他们在家的时候,妈妈总是大喊大叫着抱怨生活处处不如意。她曾经梦想住在城市里,只有在那里她的理想才能实现,而后来却住在这远离城市的乡下,这与她的理想完全两样。
我喜欢到水边呆着,在那常常一坐就是几个小时,静静地望着水中我的倒影。水中的我一点儿也不像一个漂亮的芭蕾舞演员,倒影从不撒谎。微波荡过,倒影消失了,就像我的跳舞梦想一样消失了。我坐在那儿凝望着湖水,多么希望水中会出现一个完全不同的美丽倒影。
随着我的成长我开始明白,之所以我的梦产生,是因为那个梦就在我心里。而我的梦想从未得到过培育和呵护,因此它慢慢地死去了。我并不想让它死去,但是从我听到 “你办不到” 这话的那一天,我就放任了它的死去。最后,当我从多年来的梦想中醒来时,我才明白:你不能满足于在野花丛中跳舞,你必须设法到舞台上去跳。
现在我仍然时常到湖边坐坐,但是我看到的倒影却与过去不同了:年轻的时候,我看到的倒影是别人眼中的我;而今我因年龄增长而变得更加睿智,我看到的倒影是上帝看到的样子。
Vocabulary
ballerina n. 芭蕾舞女演员
The ballerina curves her arms above her head. 芭蕾舞女把胳膊弯曲在头上。
twirl n. &vi. 转动,旋转
She did a quick twirl to show off her dress. 她轻快地一转身,炫耀自己所穿的衣服。
slender adj. 苗条的,修长的
Her body is slender. 她的体形苗条。
paralyze vt. 使瘫痪,使麻痹
Guilt is vague and inactive and tends to paralyze you. 罪恶感是模糊的、怠惰的,往往会令你麻木。
reflection n. 倒影
One can see the reflection of the tower in the water. 塔的影子倒映在水中。
nurture v. 培育,培养
Nature passes nurture. 江山易改,本性难移。
settle for 满足于
I never settle for second—best. 我从不满足于第二好这个称谓。
platform n. 平台,舞台
people hooted the speaker off the platform. 人们把讲演者轰下讲坛。
牛津的成功启迪课
像文中的作者一样,我们每个人都有自己的梦想,而梦想实现的过程却并不容易。但是,只要我们坚定了自己的梦想,就不要轻易放弃它。我们不能因为别人的否定而让我们的梦想渐渐死去。呵护好我们的梦想,让它终有一天能够在人生的舞台上绽放。
More than One Way to the Square
We were standing at the top of a church tower. My father had brought me to this spot in a small Italian town not far from our home in Rome. I wondered why.
“Look down, Elsa,” Father said. I gathered all my courage and looked down. I saw the square in the center of the village. And I saw the crisscross of twisting, turning streets leading to the square.
“See, my dear,” Father said gently. “There is more than one way to the square. Life is like that. If you can’ t get to the place where you want to go by one road, try another.”
Now I understood why I was there. Earlier that day I had begged my mother to do something about the awful lunches that were served at school. But she refused because she could not believe the lunches were as bad as I said.
When I turned to Father for help, he would not interfere. Instead, he brought me to this high tower to give me a lesson. By the time we reached home, I had a plan.
At school the next day, I secretly poured my luncheon soup into a bottle and brought it home. Then I talked the cook into serving it to Mother at dinner. The plan worked perfectly. She swallowed one spoonful and sputtered, “The cook must have gone mad!” Quickly I told what I had done, and Mother stated firmly that she would take up the matter of lunches at school the next day!
In the years that followed I often remembered the lesson Father taught me. I knew where I wanted to go in life. I wanted to be a fashion designer. And on the way to my first small success I found the road blocked. What could I do? Accept the roadblock and fail, or use imagination and wits to find another road to my goal?
I had come to Paris, the center of the world of fashion, with my sketches. But none of the famous fashion designers seemed interested in buying them. Then one day I met a friend who was wearing a very beautiful sweater. It was plain in color, but it had a lovely and unusual stitch.
“Did you knit that sweater?” I asked her.
“No,” she answered. “It was done by a woman here in Paris.”
“What an interesting stitch!” I continued.
My friend had an explanation, “The woman’ s name is Mrs. Vidian—she told me she learned the stitch in Armenia, her native country.”
Suddenly I pictured a daring design knitted into such a sweater. Then an even more daring idea came to me. Why not open my own house of fashion? Why not design, make and sell clothes from the house of Schiaparelli! I would do it, and I would begin with a sweater.
I drew a bold black and white butterfly pattern and took it to Mrs. Vidian. She knitted it into a sweater. The result, I thought, was wonderful. Then came the test. I wore the sweater to a luncheon which people in the fashion business would attend. To my great pleasure, the sweater was noticed. In fact, the representative of a large New York store wanted 40 sweaters to be ready in two weeks. I accepted the order and walked out on a cloud of happiness.
My cloud disappeared suddenly, however, when I stood in front of Mrs. Vidian. “But it took me almost a week to knit that one sweater,” she said. “Forty sweaters in two weeks? It is not possible!”
I was crushed to be so close to success and then to be blocked! Sadly I walked away. All at once I stopped short. There must be another way. This stitch did take special skill. But surely there must be other Armenian women in Paris who knew how to do it.
I went back to Mrs. Vidian and explained my plan. She really didn’ t think it would work, but she agreed to help.
We were like detectives, Mrs. Vidian and I. We put ourselves on the trail of any Armenians who lived in Paris. One friend led us to another. At last we tracked down 20 women, each of whom could knit the special stitch. Two weeks later the sweaters were finished. And the first shipment from the new house of Schiaparelli was on its way to the United States!
From that day a steady stream of clothes and perfumes flowed from the house of Schiaparelli. I found the world of fashion gay and exciting, full of challenge and adventure. I shall never forget one showing which was really a challenge. Once again Father’ s advice helped me. I was busy getting ready to show my winter fashions. Then just 13 days before the presentation the sewing girls were called out on strike. I found myself left with one tailor and woman who was in charge of the sewing room! I was as gloomy as my models and salesgirls. “We’ ll never make it,” one of them cried.
Here, I thought, is the test of all tests for Father’ s advice. Where is the way out this time? I wondered and worried. I was certain we would have to call off the presentation or else show the clothes unfinished. Then it dawned on me. Why not show the clothes unfinished?
We worked hurriedly. And, exactly 13 days later, right on time, the Schiaparelli showing took place.
What a showing it was! Some coats had no sleeves; others had only one. Many of our clothes were still in an early stage. They were only patterns made of heavy cotton cloth. But on these we pinned sketches and pieces of material. In this way we were able to show that what colors and textures the clothes would have when they were finished.
All in all, the showing was different. It was so different that it was a great success. Our unusual showing caught the attention of the public, and orders for the clothes poured in.
Father’ s wise words had guided me once again. There is more than one way to the square always.